MovieChat Forums > Love Actually (2003) Discussion > Did Richard Curtis have a mid life crisi...

Did Richard Curtis have a mid life crisis before writing this?


Just rewatched this movie again on tv. Didn't really like it the first time int he theaters very much, but thought it was fine and wanted to give it another shot bc it's so popular.

13 years later, I'm watching with a more critical eye, and it just seems like every single storyline - with the exception of a few - is about a white, middle aged dude having a mid-life crisis and soothing his mangst by chasing after a sexy, younger woman who is 'below his station' socially/financially.

Alan Rickman is cheating on his wife by nearly carrying on with the predatory assistant (who is given more blame than the cheater) and then never really making amends with his wife when she finds out.

Sad sack Colin Firth, who was cheated on by his wife, latches onto the first woman who is nice to him - a person who doesn't even speak his own language - and for some reason decides she's the perfect one for him (despite never having had an actual conversation with her). He then 'rescues' her from her dreary life of cleaning houses and waiting tables with a far-fetched proposal, despite them only sharing one chaste kiss and NEVER HAVING SPOKEN.

Hugh Grant is a lonely prime minister, awkwardly chasing after his cater waitress, whom he really has nothing in common with besides working in the same building together and both being horny. He acts like an irrational, possessive fool when the president hits on her, not because he's trying to protect her (he accidentally interrupts them, but she extricates herself from the situation), but after the fact, because his male pride is wounded and he wants to metaphorically pee on his territory.

Bill Nighy is an aging rocker who has a revelation that nobody loves him because he's been a selfish pr1ck his whole life, and he only has his BFF to hang out with -- but hey, at least he manages to hook up with some really young chicks at the end to make himself feel better. Personally, this entire storyline felt like a big 'no homo' to me? Like, it would've actually resonated and been more poignant if he'd realized that he'd been unhappy his whole life because he'd been living a false life and had actually been in love with the BFF the whole time (and vice versa), But I guess mainstream movies back then didn't go there?

Andrew Lincoln - not middle aged, but having a quarter-life crisis. The story would've been really sweet and shown how selfless love could be if it had ended when Kiera Knightly's character watched the wedding video and realized he was in love with her but he kept it a secret bc he wanted her to be happy. Instead, they had to ruin it by having him selfishly show up unannounced at her door, just so he could get himself some emotional closure - all while making her visibly uncomfortable and disrespecting his BFF, who was in the next room waiting for HIS WIFE to return. What a terrible friend! It wasn't romantic to me, it was creepy and selfish. Romantic would've been him giving her the video and explaining why he kept his distance and then continuing to keep his distance. This was like a hit and run.

Kris Marshall (the guy who went to America to get laid) - not really sure wtf this storyline was, but it felt like it came out of a totally different movie from 20 years earlier. Like Porkys or Animal House. Was this something Richard Curtis wrote while he was at university? How did this make it onscreen? Like, seriously, people filmed this and then edited it and sandwiched it between segments starring Oscar bait like Emma Thompson, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Colin Firth, Laura Linney and Liam Neeson. I mean...

Martin Freeman - this storyline was actually sweet and he was likable. One of the few actually romantic stories that appear in this film.

Liam Neeson - the best of all the stories, mainly because the love story was between him and his step-son and how he poured the love he had for his dead wife into the little boy. It was really touching and cute how he helped him go after his crush. Even sadder when you think about how his real life mirrored this not too long afterward.

Laura Linney - the only woman POV story and she is a frigid spinster who gives up sex with a hot, smart man who adores her to care for her brother. I mean, I guess it showed a type of love, but considering there were no other female POVs (unless you count Emma Thompson's, which was also really really grim and also involved a woman giving up her romantic happiness in service of her family), I was disappointed. It would've been nicer if they'd ended it with the hot guy actually going with her to see the brother or for him to be waiting back at the apartment for her, since he already said he understood that life was 'messy' and was okay with that.

Anyhoo, I'm sure this movie was super relatable for white dudes between the ages of 35-65, but as a woman, it left me really cold. I wonder if Curtis looks back at this and is proud or if he thinks he could've done better?

Four Weddings was ten years earlier and felt so much more progressive IMO. A loving gay couple, an optimistic male lead who believed in love, an older, sex-positive female lead who wasn't shamed for it, an awkward woman (Duckface) who stuck up for herself instead of settling for the man of her dreams whom she knew didn't really love her. These characters were SO much more likable. What happened?

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I think you're probably right; the film is full of women bringing men cups of tea.

It's a pity the one gay love story was cut - have you watched the deleted scenes? Two older women, and a very strong story. Why cut that?

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Wow, great observations and I agree with all your points!

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Just rewatched this movie again on tv. Didn't really like it the first time int he theaters very much, but thought it was fine and wanted to give it another shot bc it's so popular.


I swear I'm not following you around, Jones! Okay so I am. Your posts are very insightful.

And Lindy West agrees with your thoughts on Love Actually
http://jezebel.com/i-rewatched-love-actually-and-am-here-to-ruin-it-for-al-1485136388

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All terrific points. I saw this movie on Netflix the other night. I have to agree with your assessment that love actually seems to be for white, middle aged men. Emma Thompson and Laura Linney are attractive women, but their makeup, hair, and costumes were awful.

"No one forgets the truth, Frank, they just get better at lying."-Richard Yates🔍

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Kiera Knightly's character was not "visibly uncomfortable." She was smiling and laughing the whole time.

But I agree with most of your points. In fact, I love Four Weddings and A Funeral way more than Love Actually, which I just thought was okay, not great (yes, I know I'm in the minority).

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Romantic comedies tend to appeal mainly to female audiences, and women tend to like the idea of 'marrying up' so a woman marrying a man of somewhat higher status is always popular.

Likewise a wronged wife whose husband has been unfaithful to her is bound to get a lot of female sympathy - even i get pissed off when she open the parcel she thinks is going to be a lovely gold necklace and all she gets is that crappy CD.

i hated the stepfather/stepson story, i thought it was nauseatingly sentimental. All it needed was a lovable hairy dog. and the stepfather seems to be getting interested in another woman only weeks after his wife's death.

The man in love with his best friend's wife is a pretty silly story, and the scene with the cards is ridiculous, but once the wife realised he was in love with her, there doesn't seem much point in him keeping his feelings to himself any more, he might as well tell her how he feels. And he lightens the mood with humour and makes her laugh, which probably helps her as well as him.

I thought the MArtin freeman story wAs charming.

The aging rock star who discovers his manager is the most important person in his life i thought was funny and quite touching - had he turned out to be gay it would have been okay i suppose but not so interesting.

i don't think the laura linney character is adored by that rather wet man she goes to bed with - he gives up very easily. if he really adored her he wouldn't have been put off by one botched sexual encounter, he would ahve given it another go. And he wasn't very hot anyway.

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