QUOTES!

- Doo-dah enters

Doo-Dah: "Sweet chim-chimeney, cold corn in the morning. This weather is killing my joints."

Tom: "Brian, go get the shovel!"



Gandolfini was hilarious in this movie.

Everyones filing down the stairs after finding a stunned Brian staring at the pictures of his mother on the screen.

Letitia: "Missy! Get your coat! We're leaving!"

Drew: "But there's ham!"

After they all see an interesting picture of Christine on Brian's computer

Christine: "Oh sh*t! Tom, I don't know what that is."

Tom: "I know what it is... It's my wife on my son's computer shootin' a 'V'
for victory with her legs!"

Tom answers the door to find Doo-dah's understudy has come to play the grandfather while Drew's girlfriend's parents are there. He tries to tell Drew, but Drew doesn't seem to care since his girlfriend's parents have never seen Doo-dah. Tom says "Fine!" and lets Doo-dah in...

Doo-dah: "Sweet chim-chiminey, cold corn in the morning..."

Drew: (Sees Doo-dah and is stunned. He stops him) "Who are you?"

Doo-dah: "I'm Saul's understudy. I've just come to help out" (continues into the room greeting everyone)

Tom walks over to Drew.

Drew: "Is he black?"

Tom: (grinning ever so slightly) "Yup."

- Just the way Gandolfini says "Fine!", the way he opens the door with a flourish and the way he says "Yup." at the end of the scene is absolutely hilarious!

Tom: I think your mother is starting to like your grandfather hitting on her.

Drew: Well, that's not something you hear very often on Christmas Eve.

(After Drew has decorated the tree.)
Drew: "How does it(the tree) look?"

Brian: "Like it could trigger a seizure."


(This is when Alicia first comes home and wonders what the hell is going on.)
Kate: (to Alicia) "Drew wants a nice family for Christmas, so we're going to be his family."

Alicia: "That's insane."

Drew:"Tell me about it. I never had a sister, so this is going to be *beep* right here."


(In the kitchen while Kate is making Drew some hot cocoa.)
Alicia: "Speaking of your real mom, why aren't you annoying the hell of of your own family?"



(This is after Drew has told Alicia she will be Consuela, the Ecuadorian housekeeper, and they are saying corny lines that Drew has written at the table.)
Alicia: "Gee, Beav, do you think Wally's gonna give you the business?"

Drew: Oh, There you are,Consuela. Five waters for everyone please. Gracias."



Drew: 'Listen, when Alicia came, she ruined everything."

Alicia: "Right , because everything was just so normal up until that point---"

Drew: "Silencio, por favor."


(When Drew is trying to get Alicia to go tobogganing with him.)
Drew: "Then why won't you go with me?"

Alicia: "Because it would be with you."


(When Drew and Alicia are talking with Missy, right after Alicia has just found out about Missy.)

Alicia: "Yeah, that's my brother, Juts never afriad to put a price tag on his feelings."

Drew: "Yeah, that's my sister, never understanding there's a such thing as love, and you can care about somebody and want to show it ina big way, and you shouldn't be put down and mocked, and made hurt feelings."

Alicia:"Well, what my brother doesn't understand is that when you love someone you don't have to show it in a big way.'

Drew:"Really, so I guess you were just slumming back there when you were making out with me in the kitchen?"


(The black Doo-dah after everyone has left.)
B Doo-Dah: "I feel bad drinking liquor that you're going to need."



(When Drew and Brian are arguing at the play at whether Brian should try to talk to the girl sitting right next to him.)
Girl: "I can hear you."




(At the end, as Drew is kissing Alicia outisde, and Missy has her father stop to see.)
Missy: " Oh, my God."

Leticia: " Oh, My God!"

The Father: " He's kissing his sister."

Leticia: " That's open mouth!"

The Father: "Tis the season to be jolly."



"Eva's sisters gave her a cross with Jesus on it for her birthday, the next day Jesus was gone!"

THe squeaky stair was definitely the best! The other one I really liked is when Ben Affleck woke up Bryan and said: "WAKE UP! It's you BROTHER-KIND-OF!"