It's a looong time since I read Mansfield Park, but my memory of Sir Thomas is not that he was "oppressive" - or at any rate I do not believe that is how Austen wished the reader to see him.
One of the prime duties of a parent in Sir Thomas' position was to ensure that his children were brought up with strong principles. Their education could usually be left to others, but their character and the standard of their behaviour was something that would be formed by parental action or lack of it. This is why, for example, Mr Bennett in Pride and Prejudice realises that Lydia's behaviour is in some measure his fault. He let up grow up without correcting either her sense of decorum (nil) or her morals (ditto).
Sir Thomas is, in the book, an upright but disengaged parent who has allowed his daughters to grow up without him realising that their mother took no interest in them, and their aunt thought they could do no wrong. This is the era of "spare the rod and spoil the child," and those two are clearly spoiled rotten. That is, they have been indulged and become corrupted. A good father, in that period, would have kept a much sterner eye and firmer control over the development of his children - at least once he realised that no one else was doing it.
When Sir Thomas returns from Antigua, he realises how out of control his family, especially his daughters, have become. I think he also realises that Fanny - alone of the women at Mansfield Park - has a strong inner moral compass. She may be too timid to speak out, but she cannot be bullied or cajoled into doing something that she thinks is wrong. Sir Thomas then tries to do what he thinks is best for Fanny - which might not be what either Fanny or the reader wishes for her, but which accords with the values of the period when the book was written.
I know that Mansfield Park is the trickiest of the major Austen works to film, since its values and its heroine are the ones least likely to appeal to a modern audience. Patience, goodness and timidity are difficult to make attractive these days - especially when the heroine also has "a delicate constitution". It would be nice, however, to see a writer/director make a real attempt, rather than simply re-writing the book with a different heroine altogether.
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