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100 things the South Park movie has taught us

posted 17 years ago by roguetrip99
83 replies | jump to latest

1. Phillip is a pig *beep* because, first of all, he *beep* pigs
2. Kyle's mom is the biggest bitch in the whole world, and even kids in Africa will attest to that
3. Muslims are right about heaven containing 72 virgins
4. Canadians look like poorly animated paper dolls
5. Saddam Hussein is gay, super horny, and even more evil than Satan himself
6. The population of hell is 13 trillion and steadily rising
7. "Barbara Streisand" is the foulest word in the English language
8. American soldiers like being entertained by flaming homosexuals
9. If you get in trouble in school, they send you to the counselor rather than the principal or dean
10. The U.N. building has a skull and crossbones flag in front of it
11. Canadians like to say "buddy" alot
12. Liza Menelli has a huge red ass

[–] dogsoldier_spoon-1 17 years ago

13. you can set a fart on fire

x-men 4 script:
http://former.imdb.com/title/tt0376994/board/thread/69179793

[–] runescapepass 17 years ago

14. candains are funny but we shouldn't make fun of them
15. "pissed" is a swear word

[–] brickbyboringbrick33 17 years ago

16. Kyles mom is a mean old bitch and she has stupid hair
17. What exactly Brian Boitano WOULD Do
18. That Canada isn't even A real country anyway

you're the five people I'm going to meet in HELL!

[–] mr_ba_baracus 17 years ago

19. If you have a V chip and you get an electric shock, you become as powerful as Neo.

[–] jellehoeksma 17 years ago

I learned what's a butt for ...

for pooping, silly.

[–] lolcakes666 16 years ago

167. Hell isn't a swear word
168. Kenny almost always goes to hell when he dies

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] GreeneTurtle77 17 years ago

The Emancipation Proclamation is hip hop

"Those aren't ideas! They're just special effects!"

"I...I don't understand the difference"

[–] mousewiz 17 years ago

21. The sound a giraffe makes when it's dying.
22. If you want chicks, find the clitoris
23. And be confident
24. The french are good at revolutions
25. Punch and pie is a sure fire way to attract people to an event
26. Everything is super when you're gay
27. If you don't want to spend your life addicted to crack homeless on the streets giving hand jobs for cash, just say mmmkay

[–] 17 years ago

[deleted]

[–] mr_ba_baracus 17 years ago

30. Satan is more naive than Butters.

[–] alexwatts4 16 years ago

...AWWW *beep*

[–] Can_a_bitch_get_a_donut 17 years ago

31. Saddam Hussein is a sandy little butthole, but
32. He can change, he can change.

Get out of the chair, dillhole!
~A.A. Milne~

[–] SlinFolo 17 years ago

33. Making threds like these is lame

[–] mr_ba_baracus 17 years ago

34. Someone who doesn't know when to lighten up is lame.

[–] Michelle93G 17 years ago

okay...i'm gunna disregard those last two...

33. Saddam Hussein randomly carries around fake dicks.
34. It was Cartman's filthy *beep* mouth that saved the world.

btw its on right now =D lol

[–] enspik 17 years ago

35. Satan is a flaming homosexual.
36. Heaven is filled with big-breasted women.
37. Kyle's mom is a b****.
38. When someone accidentally replaced your heart with a baked potatoe you have tree seconds to live.
39. Blame Canada.

[–] mr_ba_baracus 17 years ago

40. Never make a bet with Cartman.

[–] robbo888 17 years ago

41. We shouldn't say *beep* no we shouldn't say *beep* *beep* NO!

[–] BoogieDk 17 years ago

42: Winona Ryder does a ping pong ball trick.
43: Deplorable violence is okay as long as it doesnt have naughty language

Step aside a**hole
Seth Gecko ; From dusk till dawn

[–] believersnvrdie 17 years ago

44. George Clooney is still a crap doctor, just like on e.r.

his cappa was de-tated from his head!

[–] mr_ba_baracus 17 years ago

45. Gregory is a posh twat who wants to be like Gerard Butler in 300
46. If you want to make a woman like you more than any other guy, you've just got to find the clitoris

[–] reesefrancis 17 years ago

47. Kenny dies and he's blond.
48. If you wanna know if you're mom ever did a German schaisse movie, just ask her before you go to sleep.

[–] mr_ba_baracus 17 years ago

49. Kyle is the best computer hacker in the world.
50. Anything that features Kenny in a lead role is brilliant.

[–] ERJosh 17 years ago

51.Brooke Shields once farted on the set of Blue Lagoon.

[–] banddirector23 17 years ago

52. without evil there could be no good, so it must be good 2 be evil sometimes
53. a** spelunkers eat penguin sh*t
54. we also learn exactly what a rim job is

this is my signature(not to be confused with your signature)

[–] Ace_Oddity 17 years ago

55. Jew is an "F" word.
56. Nobody f'cks uncles quite like YOU

They will play what I tell them to play...for I am the mayor of Alberkerky!

[–] Michelle93G 17 years ago

57. Canadians are all the same with their beedy little eyes and flapping heads.
58. Terrance's face smell's like Philips ass.
59. Brooke Shields farted once on the set of Blue Lagoon.
60. Brian Boitano built the pyramids and beat up Kublai Khan.

[–] smithc93 17 years ago

61. The f word never hurt anybody
62.

[–] alcoholicchris 17 years ago

62. Satan really wants to live 'up there'
63. Kenny's death was the fault of the hospital assistant who missed lunch.

*beep* me, it's a leprechaun!!

[–] mr_ba_baracus 17 years ago

64. Kyle's mother is more evil than Cartman.
65. Satan is a big Johnny Depp fan.

[–] jedijellyfish 17 years ago

67: You can live for 3 seconds with a baked potato as a heart.

[–] smithc93 17 years ago

68. Cartman's mom stars in german porn
69. Stan doesn't know what the *beep* is wrong with Greman People
70. The Mole hates God

[–] CorleoneWarrior88 17 years ago

71. US soldiers are easily amused.
72. A Jew ruined the World, a white trash woman's son saved it. (notice irony)
73. You see homeless people, but you just don't care.

How is Satan a Johnny Depp fan?

[–] ORGaSMOTRON 17 years ago

Australians and Canadians are the same thing (we probably are lol).

[–] smithc93 17 years ago

75. windows 98 is not better or faster
76. the v-chip hurts
78. tomorrow night our lives will change
79. Winnona Ryder has a famous ping-pong ball trick

[–] 17 years ago

[deleted]

[–] kokain711 17 years ago

82. instead of saying F*u*(*k* yu shud say M'KAY.

83. Cartman doesn't have any jewish candy.

84. don't trust anything tht bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die..

85. Brooke shields farted ONCE on the set of blue lagoon.

Don’t judge me based on your ignorance

[–] smithc93 17 years ago

86. Horrible violence is okay, as long as there is no naughty language
87. Conan O' Brian laughed at the Terrence and Philip movie
88. There are times when you get suckerd in by drugs and alcohol and sex with women.

[–] Benoit_balls 17 years ago

89. Jesus is a U.S. soldier
90. If you're going to sing a derogatory song about someone, make sure they aren't standing behind you
91. Winona Ryder's ping pong trick isn't what it looks like
92. The Mole's mother tried to abort him
93. The inhabitants of hell poop fireballs
94. The U.S. army uses black people to protect tanks and planes
95. Terrance performed oral sex on Phillip and has a picture to prove it
96. Everything is super when you're gay
97. 5 AM is a day that will live in infamy
98. A butt is for pooping, silly
99. Don't try to discourage cussing, you never know when it might save the day
100. You can deactivate a car alarm even after your car has been demolished

[–] alienjesus 17 years ago

Since there were quite a few repeats (mostly blue lagoon and ping pong ball trick) I'll add a few more.

101. Bich is latin for generosity.

102. The U.S. government has zero tolerance for faulty operating systems.

103. Homeless people will do anything for a bottle of vodka.

I'm gonna eat your brains and gain your knowledge

[–] Michelle93G 17 years ago

104. Ike knows how to play the harmonica.
105. A butt is for pooping silly!...(it took me several years to actually figure that joke out xD lmao)

106. The Mole *beep* hates guard dogs.
107. Cartman doesn't know the difference between French and British people.
108. The Mole's real name is Christof.

[–] deanojs 17 years ago

109.Souls being tortured in hell make pretty great back up singers
110. Mr garrison can't wait for first shore leave so he can get him some hot fuc king poon tang
111. Saddam Hussein is from mars, Satan is from venus

[–] yasiru89 17 years ago

the last 3 are repeats, so;

112. Cartman has been calling Kyle a 'jew' for so long that he can sometimes think of it as just an insult and not what Kyle is!

113. Cartman's mom is an awefully calm and friendly crack whore if her Schitzche (I don't know how to spell that) porno is anything to go by!

[–] !!!deleted!!! (2540476) 17 years ago

109. Random wristwatches will reveal the start of the third act of some movies.

110. Trey Parker is a big fan of the Indiana Jones movies.

111. When it comes to women, the most important "C" word is CONFIDENCE!

[–] sfwmson 16 years ago

You can't get kids to stay at a Save Terrance and Philip meeting if you don't have cake and pie.

[–] jillid17 17 years ago

100-something: This is the best Musical ever
NEVER trust Conan O'Brien
Brian Boitano can time travel

We're playing poker for gum.

[–] duguay_martin 17 years ago

61. Canadian pussy is mighty cold.

[–] zakso999 15 years ago

51. you can't say *beep* in school you *beep* fatass!

[–] adampearce96 17 years ago

100.kyles moms a bitch

[–] smithc93 17 years ago

Dr vosknoker invented the v-chip

[–] cbar323 17 years ago

The U.S. army uses african-americans as defense.

[–] smithc93 17 years ago

Ike can play a mean harmonica

[–] scottybmp04 17 years ago

120(ish): Cartman brings a megaphone to class to clarify things.
121: Kenny is great at giving relationship advice.
122: What the priest said to the Iranian geinecologist.

[–] Michelle93G 17 years ago

123. Satin owns a rainbow hang glider

[–] porbing 17 years ago

Guys, Base on what you guys stated, I'm gonna make a full list. Wait for it.

[–] snaxmojo 16 years ago

121. the Mole fv<king hates guard dogs
122. more people will come if they think there's punch and pie
123. there are microwaves in ER rooms
124. those who drive trucks of salt are horrible drivers and will park in front of a hospital
125. a car alarm is more annoying than realizing someone has fallen 100 stories and crushed your car
126. the only thing that sucks about being a Baldwin is that you don't have a bomb shelter
127. musicals can be entertaining if they make fun of other musicals
128. Cartman's mom took a poo in the face

Bangkok Dangerous better be the greatest movie ever made. But it won't be. It's going to suck.

[–] Sean-Furlong-1989 16 years ago

129. Ike is too young for this
130. Kids in The Netherlands and France know what a *beep* Kyles's mum is
131. Canada is to balme for the downfall of American children.

Mrs Voorhees is watching you!

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] lucio_korn07 16 years ago

141. Cartman's mom likes German people.

Didn't see it on the list...

[–] jimmi92 16 years ago

142: The US army should think twice about sacrificing its black troops

[–] trigger_cairns 16 years ago

143: cartman heard what you said the first time, you British piece of sh!t!
144: parents really do not have a sense of humour
145: being electricuted is worse than falling asleep, and having your mate put his dick in your mouth and taking a picture
146: mr hat wants to be satans best friend
147: now the boys little lives are complete

[–] jimmi92 16 years ago

148: Brian Denadey should get the fu** outta here

[–] roguetrip99 16 years ago

149. Saddam Hussein is sexually aroused by the idea of taking over the world
150. "The Emancipation Proclamation" is the name of a hip-hop song
151. Satan is really a big softie
152. Poop has been ruled edible
153. Kyle's mom will gladly upstage the president of the U.S.
154. The Mole really, REALLY hates God
155. Stan needs to stop thinking with his dick
156. Kyle thinks Cartman's mom sucks...even though HIS mom started a war and almost caused the end of the world
157. The password is "La Resistance"...and "Bacon"
158. Saddam can still sing after being impaled on a stalagmite
159. Shelly likes Britney Spears
160. Terrance and Phillip singlehandedly keep Canada's economy afloat
161. Brian Boitano is some kind of superhero/demigod

[–] AnyaAngel22 16 years ago

162. Conan is extremely resiliant, considering he got impaled on a car 10 years ago and is still ticking. :)
163. Shelley was listening to records in 1999, not a cassette or a CD, lol.
164. Brian Boitano eats a lot of spicey chicken wings. (end credits)
165. Satan's ideal world is where babies burp and flowers bloom.
166. If you are wanted by the American government, you probably shouldn't be a guest on Conan.

One thing I can't figure out is whether it is a good thing or a bad thing that Cartman no longer has his screwy V-Chip powers. :)

Vote for your fave video games at the Chibiusas! animecauldron.com/vg_diva/chibiusa/chibiusa

[–] scott-sw 16 years ago

That killing the Baldwins is an act of war.
A clitoris can talk.
That a potato can replace a heart-albeit only for a few seconds.

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] trada122 16 years ago

170. The Mole is a French kid
171. There's nothing sucking about being a Baldwin
172. What the Spanish priest said to the Iranian gynecologist was a fart
173. You shouldn't miss church or else you'll end up in hell
174. Kyle likes to kick Ike
175. Terrance and Philip: Asses of Fire is rated R and was number 1 at the box office
176. In order for Mr. Garrison to understand what a student is saying, the student must use a megaphone
177. Cartman thinks getting grounded for 3 weeks is bullsh^t
178. Stan was holding up the goddamn lunch line because he was staring at Wendy
179. Mr. Garrison thinks Clyde is a complete retard
180. Philip is a pig f^$%er because he f^&%s pigs
181. When you spell out Forensics, you write "Suck My Ass"
182. Getting high on Pot is unacceptable but getting high on Pottery is ok
183. Cartman is stoked that he doesn't have to pay Kenny the 100 dollars they bet
184. In order for a person to get into heaven, you need to press a giant red button that says "Push"
185. In 1999, Heaven population was 1656 and Hell population was approximately 923,565,420,000 and is still rising
186. Canadians can say ABOOT but they can't say ABOUT
187. Bill Clinton appointed Kyle's mom as The Secretary of Offense
188. Americans call Death Camp "HAPPY CAMP"
189. Cartman likes to eat chips while his friends are singing
190. The Mole is grounded because he said very naughty things about God
191. Stan thinks The Mole is really f$#%ed up
192. The Mole carries around a fake binocular
193. Apparently you can see fart jokes on Nickelodeon
194. Stan thanks The Clitoris when he finally gets Wendy to like him

[–] contrida 16 years ago

195. Mohatma Gandhi and hitler live in hell
196. The only person who wants to touch Cartman is Butters
197. Clyde doesn't know the answer to 5 x 2
198. Heaven only has 1,916 people in it
199. Saddam Hussein can still sing in hell even when he's dead
200. To get into an R Rated movie pay a homeless guy 10 dollars to get you in

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] discodave4093 15 years ago

203. If you have a v chip in you can't say s**t in english but you can say in in german

[–] karlosiscrash 15 years ago

1,000. did i say death camp? i meant happy camp :D

[/b]My name is Hakmed, and im a terrorist[/b]

[–] pedroxqui 15 years ago

205. (can't believe no one said this) Terrance and Phillipe are Sweet... SUPER SWEET!!!

[–] roguetrip99 15 years ago

206. Brian Boitano is like Chuck Norris on ice skates

[–] roguetrip99 14 years ago

207: "Forensics" is spelled "S-U-C-K-M-Y-A-S-S"

[–] nageltr 11 years ago

208. 82nd Airborne Loves Yippie!!

Great, now we gotta do the rest of this thing with Danny Elfman!

[–] slapshotu 11 years ago

number. whatever. If your gonna get served dance to billy ray cyrus.

[–] candre0714 11 years ago

Stan is gentle and mild, just like Jesus.

[–] GruesomeTwosome 11 years ago

209. Eat Snacky S'mores

Fighting the frizzies, at 11.

[–] Xavior_Penguin 11 years ago

210. To get a girl you're obsessed with to like you, confidently search out and rub her clitoris.

Damn, if only I knew this in third grade. That hot 17-year-old kindergarten teacher would've totally been into me.

~Lance

[–] htownsteve 10 years ago

I honestly cannot believe after 15 years, these haven't been said yet:

211. According to James Hetfield, Hell isn't good, and Hell is hot.
213. SAtan has a giant picture of Skeet Ulrich over his bed.
214. God is the biggest b1tch of them all
215. Saddam doesn't nurture Satan's emotions.
216: Canadian soldiers charge you with hockey sticks

and, my all-time personal favorite one ever,
217: Big Gay Al's pianist plays a "Felcher & Sons" piano.

If you don't know why that's funny, google "felching"

Son, you can't polish a turd