Things I learned by watching the first 30 minutes of Neon Maniacs

1. $5.00 is way too much for a case of beer.
2. Pasta breath is a great cut down to say to your enemy in front of your ladies.
3. When someone interrupts you and your girlfriend at the park by throwing fire crackers at you... Be sure to counter the move with a loud burp to show you mean business.
4. Whenever a weird Neon Maniac comes toward you wielding a sword. Try to light him on fire with a firecracker.
5. Police stations have only one desk light and no others inside. Everyone just sits around working in the dark until it turns light outside.
6. Being scared instantly makes you cold. You will need a blanket to feel better.
7. The police won't believe you when you are found locked into a beaten to crap van with the windshield smashed in - when you tell them that all of your friends got brutally murdered. No one will try looking for the kids that got murdered. Instead a police detective will just say "wait for the morning to see what it brings" followed by a weird wink and a puff on a cigar.
8. Whenever you get attacked by mutant freaks and all your friends are killed... The best thing to do on that same night is to go out for a leisurely swim when you get back from the police station.
9. After watching all of your friends die right in front of you. Don't let it bother you. Just go to school the next day. You might seem a little depressed, but that's okay. You can never take a day off from school - Ever.