MovieChat Forums > The Mirror Has Two Faces (1996) Discussion > Question: Could you start a relationshi...

Question: Could you start a relationship in these terns?

posted 21 years ago by avidanaoeumsonho
21 replies | jump to latest

Hi everyone!

I have a question for all of you:
Could you start (and of course, maintain) a relationship like Gregory (Jeff Bridges) wanted?
Do you think it is possible? To eliminate any physical or sexual contact between two lovers? A relationship where you can only rely on friendship and pure love, and still be close as there is to someone?

Let me hear your opinions about it, I'm VERY interested!

Do excuse a possible lack of grammatical accuracy.
Compliments from Portugal

[–] frenchiesh 21 years ago

This is my favorite movie of all time. A good romantic comedy.
I believe it is everyone women fantasy to have that kind of relationship. We all want respect in our relationships. It is difficult to find someone like the Jeff Bridges character. But most importantly, you do need some kind of physical attraction. The characters are attracted to each other but Greg is so fixated in having this non-sexual relationship that he doesn't realize it. One moment where it is obvious is at the restaurant and she gets up to go and use the restroom, he feels off his chair. It is obvious that he wants her.
You can email me. Thanks and glad to speak to someone from Portugal.

[–] Louisekelly86 20 years ago

Hey!
For a start "The Mirror has Two faces" is one of my favourite movies.
i think that realtionships would be better if they started off relying on friendship and not physical passion and lust. You would get to know a person so much better if all those things were eliminated, i wouldnt say forever but for a while. Then you truly know the person and love them for who they are.
so as for your question i think i could start the realtionship but not maintain it!

[–] freefall79 20 years ago

that being said i thing that gregopory is a fool for his entire approach, the scene where she has a make over & he's upset. wht because she want to look beautiful for herself. his entire outlook is motivated by sex or lack of it you just want to slap him.

Thunderbirds Aren't Slow

[–] littlemissromantic 19 years ago

He's not a fool. When he sees Rose's makeover, I don't think he's initially bitter towards her because she wants to make herself feel physically attractive, he respects her too much for that. But because by this time he's realised that he's possibly in love with her, which obviously dampens his theory and what he's trying to prove. Then when he sees her in person after a slight separation, the reality of that fact probably hits him harder and he's probably angry at himself for allowing it to happen and at her for being the cause of it. I don't think it's to do with the fact that she's done this for herself, but that by changing her appearance she's broken the rules in a sense, and that puts a glitch in his mathematical equation.

"Lovin' might be a mistake but it's worth makin'"- Ronan Keating (I Hope You Dance)

[–] vicky_lc2001 (1907) 8 years ago

I agree.

[–] marvinter 19 years ago

Hi.

Have anyone seen "The Object of My Affection" with Jennifer Aniston and Paul Rudd?
In that case, the partner was a gay, but I think the question is almost the same:
it is very hard to maintain a relationship where there are not physical atraction and sexual contact between the partners.

Does anyone disagree?

[–] Mikurtis 18 years ago

What would be the point of a marriage like the one Gregory initially wants to have with Rose? I mean, what differentiates the spouse from your best friend in this kind of scenario? I think Barbra put it best when she was interviewed at the time of the movie's release: "He's warped"

[–] Farnsworthphile 17 years ago

Gregory didn't know how to separate love from lust/passion/romance. He felt that romance and sex would ruin a long term relationship with someone and is therefore a lot of wasted time and full of heartbreak. Rose has felt so alone and sad for so long that she was willing to suppress her own feelings of lust/passion/romance in the beginning of the marriage. She decided to leave when she realizes the importance of these emotions on the way to achieving real love.

[–] baran_erik 10 years ago

It depends on the people. There are those that truly have no interest in a physical relationship. If two such people found each other and enjoyed each others company enough to want to spend "til death do you part", ,ore power to them. I just know I couldn't do that.

[–] vicky_lc2001 (1907) 8 years ago

Yes I have seen that. This kind of arrangement was probably more common in the past but with so m differences like that film with Meryl Streep, "Florence Foster Jenkins."

[–] roxstar56 16 years ago

In response to the OP's question, I think that we already have relationships like this!...Thanks to the internet!

Sure, when the couple finally meet it may end up in a relationship with sexual love. But the weeks/ months before the meeting consists of pure chat (except for those cyber-sex people, lol) Now don't get me wrong, I know that there are weird creeps who deceive people online but there are a few gems out there.

I know of a couple who met in a chat room and talked for 2 years before they met. The bond between them was sickening (lol) in a lovey-dovey way. They are still together. Basically their relationship was based on friendship firstly, and has blossomed into a strong conventional relationship.

So could these relationships exist? yes. But not for long because instinctively we need personal interaction and sex.

(Sorry to quote Dr OZ, but the four needs a human has is food, water, air, and sex. Forgive me if I'm wrong with the quote, but it was along those lines)

_______________________________
www.stoptheremake.com

[–] ladynarana 16 years ago

My most serious relationships have always started with friendships first. Several of my best and closest friends through the years have been guys...but only a couple of those became more intimate. But I could never live with those guys who remained purely my friends. That much intimacy wasn't going to be good for our friendship.

So my bottom-line answer...I'm an ugly ducklng, too, although I'll never be a swan. (And I think she looked prettier before the transformation, IMNSHO.) And I still wouldn't have a relationship on this footing.

[–] Zuzu_Petals 16 years ago

I don't understand how people can seriously say that he respected her?? He didn't respect at all her natural need to be loved in a sexual way, kissed and hugged, seen as beautiful and sexy by her husband, the man that supposed to love her the most. He was self-obsessive jerk.
Of course the long married couples sometimes don't feel the need for frequent sex anymore, but kissing and hugging and other signs of affection are always part of true love and respect. I didn't love the movie at all, it felt so contrived and implausible.

[–] 16 years ago

[deleted]

[–] susansmoose 13 years ago

to answer this question..yes i would enter into a relationship like the one that gregory proposed however, i'm sure it wouldn't last...he already fell in love with the old rose in the restaurant when she spilled the dressing on her clothes..he knew it, he had to, he just didn't want to admit it until he confessed that he loved rose to henry...

after the makeover, i think he's trying to tell her that he's in love with her but she never lets him speak..

as for respect, yes, he had a lot of respect for her...her teaching was one of them and her knowledge of prime numbers (his favorite subject) was another...she always taught him something new about himself, something different..

this is one of my favorite films as well...i might not like barbara, but she and jeff bridges are fabulous in this film...

[–] vicky_lc2001 (1907) 8 years ago

I too thought he fell in love with her before her transformation and the night she requested to have sex, he was already sexually attracted to her. It was his stubborn nature that got in the way. And it took her leaving him for him to realize it.

[–] DwarvesAreVeryUpsetting 10 years ago

If a man sought me out for a relationship like this, I would feel so insulted! I don't see how anyone could think that he was respectful of her. The whole marriage was hinging on her supposed unattractiveness...... the idea that she was so homely, he'd never be tempted to have sex with her.

[–] aguedes-46975 8 years ago

Ah, women! Complicated little creatures! Suppose we get to know each other and we go out sometimes. We enjoy each other's company. Well, I am not as handsome as Jeff Bridges (but not as ugly as Vincent Cassell either, eheheheh)....but to make a long reasoning short, one nice day I approach you and say: It seems we get along well, so what about raising (or lowering) the bar and jump to the next level? I am not into commitment and/or responsibility. I just want to have sex with you as often as you allow me to......Would you, or most women, I believe, feel just as insulted?

[–] baran_erik 10 years ago

Not. In. A. Million. Years.

[–] vicky_lc2001 (1907) 8 years ago

Maybe. Tbh I'm unfairly paranoid of men. I feel like they're undressing you all the time so I fear or am paranoid about their lasciviousness.

[–] Druff (1847) a year ago

We can't help it. Our reproductive hormones are constantly demanding that we stop wasting the millions and millions of sperm we produce every day and pump it into literally any hole we can find. Whereas your female reproductive hormones are telling you "You only get one egg a month, it's precious, don't waste it! Don't give it up to the first swinging dick that comes walking down your street! Save it for the most handsome and richest prince you can get!" So ffs, just relax and cut us a break. Your goodies ain't made out of gold, give 'em up once in a while!