In the original Liaisons Dangereuses, I think the main characters are adults who are married to other people. When translating this to teenagers in Cruel Intentions, I think step-siblings made sense in that it was as taboo as adultery was in 1780, but not as taboo as incest, so it gave it kind of a similar vibe without veering into being too disgusting.
Similarly, in Emma, Emma and Mr. Knightley grew up together (with him being older). I think in a movie, it would be too obvious that they'd get together if he were the best friend growing up. Pretty much every movie does that except like Pretty in Pink. Step-siblings is too close of a relationship (and in Emma, there's no taboo or weirdness with Emma and Mr. Knightley being together), so they went with ex-step. It comes as kind of a surprise that they end up together, as you're thinking she'll get with the Christian character for quite some time. I think the surprise translates well. Besides, it fits in with the 90s California thing, people being married multiple times.
That's my analysis, lol. I don't think it had anything to do with the culture of the 90s or anything like that.
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