The Real Star/Hero
Stoney(Pauly Shore) is an amazing and extremely likable(even lovable) character. Funny, friendly, empathetic, intuitive, thoughtful, loyal, polite, intelligent, and honest. He even seems kinda "Zen", especially in his perception of popularity.
This post will be a bit of a tribute to The Great Stoney.
When they think Link melted away he says, "It just wasn't meant to be" while consoling Dave(very zen).
When Link flips out in Dave's room Stoney has the insight to know fire on-demand would captivate and placate a caveman.
He graciously accepts Dave's name(Link) instead of his own idea.
He addresses Dave's parents respectfully(sometimes playfully) and even compliments their cooking.
He calls Dave out for trying to use Link as a tool to gain popularity(Wheezing his juice), and makes it clear from the get-go he wants nothing to do with it.
"I think he likes your cones".
"Hey, hey, hey, Senorita! That hurt my lobes. I didn't do it, they started the whole thing..."
When he splits the burrito in half he takes the part Link already took a bite out of. So selfless(even if kinda gross).
Photo bombing hotties and phvking with mascots at "mega mountain".
"Shoo fly don't bother me, cuz you belong to my friend link".
"We're cooooool(sarcastically)... Dave I even showered bro. I got the raddest deodorant on buddy. Here, smell."
"That was harsh, Matt..."
"Cavemen aren't like us, Dave. They fought for food and survival. They did not fight for popularity. What would he be fighting for, huh? Cool, huh? He doesn't know what 'cool' is, Dave. He doesn't know where he is, bro. He knows nothing".
"Ow, my pancreas".
He understands Link in the museum and does his best to comfort him. "We are your new family. It will be okay".
"Hola mi amigos. Is it okay if I just chill upon here"?
"Wait wait, stop! Dude, do I have to pay for them"?
"Call him back, Dave. That's harsh! You are the one who wheezed off his gig the whole time cuz you thought maybe he'd get you somewhere. And now the guy gets a little crusty and you're just gonna bag him. It's not happening, Dave. I'm sorry that's not how it works with friends, man. You don't bag your friends just cuz they get in your way, no matter what, dude".
He immediately forgives Dave for attacking him and making him bleed.
"SHUSH"!
"It's your cave nug"!
They even end the film with a Stoney howl, the popular "I'll be back" line, and finally Pauly yelling, "Oh Yeah, stoners! What's up bro! Party fiesta!" as the credit song begins. Makes me suspect the director liked Stoney as much as I do.