MovieChat Forums > Switched at Birth (1991) Discussion > question about the twiggs

question about the twiggs

posted 19 years ago by hdacrow
18 replies | jump to latest

Why did the Twiggs continue with Arlena's surgery if they knew that Arlena wasn't their real child? She was Mr. Maye's child. I find it strange that the hospital would even give the Twiggs the option. If Arlena was really Mr. Maye's child shouldn't it have been his decision? The Twiggs knew that the surgery would most likely kill Arlena. Then, after Arlena dies all of a sudden they want their real daughter Kimberly. I think that was very selfish. Mr. Maye lost his real daughter and will never get to see her.

[–] abdool3 19 years ago

Arlena was a very sick little girl- From the time she was born, She was not expected to live as long as she did - she was getting weaker and weaker and different doctors were telling the Twigs different things. Finally one doctor told the Twiggs that suregery was the best option for Arlena if she was to have a shot at reaching adulthood. And second of all- what were they supposed to do? They honestly believed that surgery was the best way so how long were they supposed to wait?
Remember:It took Bob Mays a long time to let them have a DNA test- do you really think it would have mattered to him if Arlena had lived? Are you saying he would have had the DNA test done sonner? That's a nice thought- but from the way he acted throughout the whole ordeal and even up to the 1994 custody case - he made it very clear that Arlena would never be his concern.

[–] hdacrow 19 years ago

I still don't think it was right of the Twiggs though if they knew already that Arlena was not their biological daughter. Say it was for the best though. Why all of a sudden do they want Kimberly now that Arlena is dead? Mr. Twigg lost all he had. He lost two daughters.

[–] AND77 19 years ago

abdool's assessment about Bob Mays is too harsh. He never even knew about the switch until after the death of Arlena because the Twiggs didn't pursue finding their birth child until after she died. I certainly can't speak for the man, but abdool can't, either. I remember reading in an article about the switch that Bob Mays knew Arlena was his and Barbra's birth child from the minute he saw the photo of her. He put off getting DNA testing because he knew that once it was proven that Kimberly wasn't his, she'd be taken from him forever (plus if he saw photos of Mrs. Twigg, he'd have known - the woman and Kimberly looked exactly alike).
Can you really blame a man for wanting to keep the daughter he'd raised as his own, especially since his birth daughter had died, giving him no chance to ever know her?
I know that no one is going to change anyone else's mind, here, but you can't make that kind of claim about what Mays "would have done" when he was never even given the chance.

[–] hdacrow 19 years ago

I don't blame him for wanting to keep Kimberly either. Kimberly was his daughter. He raised the little girl. He didn't even get a chance to get to know Arlena. AND77 do you know if Mr. Mays had to give Kimberly to the Twiggs or not? If the Twiggs do have Kimberly does Mr. Mays get visiting rights at all?

[–] AND77 19 years ago

No, the Twiggs eventually decided that forcing Kimberly to come live with them would result in her hating them forever. They agreed not to seek custody in exchange for visitation rights, which Bob Mays cut off after 5 visits, claiming it was too hard for Kimberly. The Twiggs continued to threaten to seek custody until Kimberly hired a lawyer and became legally emancipated from them when she was 14. Also during this time, they filed a motion to have Kimberly's name legally changed to "Arlena Twigg" against her will. It was quickly denied.
When she was 15, Kimberly made the decision to move in with the Twiggs, and basically became an emotional wreck from that point forward. She ran back and forth between the 2 homes, and eventually went to a teen shelter. She married at 18, and gave birth to a son, who was taken from her by the state when he was a year or so old. Kimberly and her husband divorced. The marriage happened in 1997, and she fought to get her child back in 1999. Some articles you'll find on Google refer to her as Kimberly Mays Twigg. I don't know if this means she legally took that name or what...
No idea what the outcome of that child custody case was, or what has become of Kimberly since then. There are rumors of prostitution, but I couldn't find anything confirming this. I just posted a question on this board asking if anyone knew what happened to Kimberly...

[–] hdacrow 19 years ago

Thank you for helping. I can't believe they would try to make a young girl change her name.

[–] hdacrow 19 years ago

I wonder if those rumors are true. Kimberly literally had a breakdown because of all of this? That is awful! I can't believe the Twiggs would do such a horrible thing. Kimberly was a little girl!

[–] Timberwolf_1019 19 years ago

Kimberly has had several breakdowns as a result of this. And I do agree that it is unfair to question what if about Mr. Mays about what might he have done or not done, if he was given the chance to even know or meet his child. And you know what bothers me is through out all of this all you hear is about the twiggs pain and what they have been through, well what about what the mays family has gone through. Not to mention the fact that they want all this info. about Kimberly, but there has not really been any chance for Bob Mays to learn about his daughter.

[–] sbdavis3 19 years ago

I wonder if things would be different if Arlena wasn't sick and didn't die. Could the families really switch the child they grew up with for a child they didn't know?

[–] abdool3 18 years ago

I dont believe the Twiggs were as bad as youre saying ....I mean they were poor people and they spent a lot of money over the years on Arlena's health care and ....when they found out that she wasnt theirs they could have stoped caring....but they wanted her to live.

[–] boz-ter 18 years ago

I have talked to the Twiggs, and even for a short period of time, lived with them, and the movie, and the press makes them out to be monsters, but I will tell you something, the Twiggs where some of the best people I know. How the move told the story, and what really happened, and how Kim really was have been a secret, but soon, very soon, all this will be reveled, so if you care about this story, wait about 6 months, because the story is about to get interesting

[–] KristinMarie24 18 years ago

i can't wait to see this movie, boz-ter..

I watched the SAB movie and it was sad. I watched it time and time again. I was going to get the book that the women wrote saying Bob was horrible to Kim, but I rather read or watch a movie based on truth.

[–] AnyaAngel22 18 years ago

Honestly, boz-ter, the Switched at Birth movie made me feel more sympathetic towards the Twiggs than Bob Mays. I didn't realize it was supposed to be the other way around. There are a few movies that I watch that no matter how many times I watch it, I keep hoping it will be different this time, and this movie is one of them. I keep hoping Arlena will live.
In my opinion, I just assumed from the movie that had Arlena survived, the Twiggs would have told her, and probably still would have saught Kim out. If they were willing to move to Florida after Arlena died, they probably would have done so if she had lived. That way even if they didn't switch the children back, they would at least live close enough to each other that both families could get to know their daughters. I have been fascinated with this story since the movie came out when I was 11. I am 27 now, and I have a 7 year old. Now, there is not even a remote chance that one day I will find out he is not mine, because he was 11 pounds at birth and 2 feet long, and was in a nursery filled with little 7 and 8 pound babies, so no switching there. But even if he wasn't mine, I would still love him, but I would also want to know my real child.
I think it is cool you know the family. I can't wait to hear the story from the siblings. Did the Twiggs have any other children after the baby swap came to light? I know in the movie they had at least one more child after Arlena.

Vote for your fave video games at the Chibiusas! animecauldron.com/vg_diva/chibiusa/chibiusa

[–] tapnfeet99 18 years ago

I personally felt for the Twiggs. It was their child who was basically kidnapped from them by the hospital and replaced with a baby who wasn't expected to live long. Is it so wrong to want your child back when you found out the truth?

[–] AnyaAngel22 18 years ago

I don't think there is anything wrong with that. I think the whole thing where they said Kimberley Mays is dead and she is Arlena Twigg was a step too far, but I understand the desire for them to at least know their own flesh and blood. Somebody in that hospital took their baby away from them, it wasn't their choice. Bob Mays would not have had such a happy life, losing his wife and then his daughter, but who knows? Maybe he would have found a doctor that could have saved her life. Maybe she wouldn't have died from her heart disease. There is no definite way of knowing what would have happened had the children gone to the right parents.

Vote for your fave video games at the Chibiusas! animecauldron.com/vg_diva/chibiusa/chibiusa

[–] dmw61003 17 years ago

I believe that both sides lost in this case. Because the Twiggs never got to know Kimberly and the Mays/Hills never got to know Arlena. I believe all custody cases should have ceased, and grant visitation (with Kimberly under the care of a child psychologist) to the Twiggs. I believe that if the Twiggs got those visitation rights they should have been ordered to reproduce copies of photos of Arlena to Mr. Mays. And Mr. Mays should have also have been given a written account of Arlena's life. I also believe Mr. Mays should have done the same (the photos and written account) with Kimberly and given it to the Mays. That way Mrs. Twigg knew why her biological daughter was so skiddish to accept a new mother. Afterall, Kimberly never knew her mother and her step-mother left her and her father.

I would have loved to have seen the story in Darlena Mays perspective (Kimberly's 2nd step-mother.)

[–] AnyaAngel22 17 years ago

That would have been nice. They never gave Mr. Mays photos of Arlena? Or maybe some home movies, since they do exist. I saw some on the 20/20 special years ago. Despite Arlena's tragic death, things did not need to turn out this way if both families had cooperated and worked together for Kimberly's best interests.

Vote for your fave video games at the Chibiusas! animecauldron.com/vg_diva/chibiusa/chibiusa

[–] AND77 16 years ago

The Twiggs were not evil - just misguided. They were victims in the situation, too. The whole "making Kimberly change her name" suit was probably suggested by lawyers as a precursor to suing for full custody. If they won that suit, how could another judge refuse to give them full custody of their own biological child with their legal name?
The whole incident blew up in their faces, though, and ended up driving a bigger wedge between them and Kimberly.