MovieChat Forums > Robot Jox (1990) Discussion > Thing I've learned from Robot Jox

Thing I've learned from Robot Jox

posted 20 years ago by BillyBarue
5 replies | jump to latest

So I've never seen "Plan 9 From Outer Space" or many old horror B movies. With that being said after just seeing "Robor Jox" it has to be the worst movie I've ever seen.

And I loved every moment of it. Here's a list of things this movie has taught us about the future.

- Anyone with poor personality traights will either be from Texas or have bad Russian Accents.

- Texans just plain don't like Japs

- Genetically superior women have no tits

- GPS systems will have a tron-like display screen

- After the cell phone craze dies down we will go back to the giant cordless phones of the late 80s

- Having the abilty to temporarily blind an opponent is not enough, you actually have to attack afterward

- A well desiged robot always has a chainsaw in the groinal region

- We will learn that sparklers make the best missle compulsion systems

- When doging machine gun fire it is always best to jump to the ground and lie perfectly still

- When in a bind just connect a few random wires together

- The Confederation will suply a large amount a napalm for no specific reason in the chest region of thier robot

- Massive explosions do not hurt Russians

- Pipes and rocks are more effective wepons thans robots and missles

- In a way to immortilize our great forefather "The Fonz" the thumbs up will become the universal language for peace

[–] 20 years ago

[deleted]

[–] zombking 19 years ago

This is coming from someone who grew up enjoying this film:

This list is probably the most hilarious satire on this particular film that I have ever seen.
-BC

[–] Cleon 16 years ago

Great post, I too was deeply influenced by this movie. I learned...

- Being illiterate doesn't mean you won't be given command of the most expensive piece of military hardware ever built by the US.

- In the future, sexual harassment will still be funny.

- All the exams and simulators can't replace the tried and true training method of the jungle gym.

- Before you go out and get one, remember, no one really benefits from a detachable rocket-propelled forearm projectile.

- If you can, definitely show up to a fight with a second pair of legs.

- Last but certainly not least, "We can live!"

[–] cold_lazarou 14 years ago

"We can BOTH live!!!"

"ACHILLEEEEESSSS!"

Genius flick!:)

[–] Uncle Dave M 8 years ago

I love these, "things I learned from..." threads.
I always learn something.

From this, my second fav sci-fi movie (after the original Andromeda strain), I learned:

- Always have a mirror attached to your arm to reflect a LASER beam.

- Not only are the cordless phones "1980's huge", but so are the security cameras, on their pa-tilt-zoom mounts.

- There will be flying car in the future, and they will be controlled by Pac-Man remotes.

- The flying cars of the future will be as large as a Cadillac but only seat two.

- The flying cars of the future will levitate on a puff of smoke.

- Robotjox suites and helmets are one-size-fits-all. And when getting out of your robot, you can just leave the whole suite behind, in-place for the next guy.

- Finally, even though you have won the match and Alaska, be sure to blow the whole thing in a moment of emotion and anger, and keep fighting after the referees tell you twice and your own boss comes on the video screen.