Squeeth's on to something there - and I like the Mrs Bates analogy (and the sentence). I don't think 'middle class work ethic' is a precise enough concept to pin down, at least not in this context. I just think Withnail's indolence and recklessness serves to remind Marwood that it's time to get on. No matter, I think this speculation about implicit homosexuality won't get anyone very far.
I certainly like imagining the back-story of characters, and I think, for example, the 6 minute Charlie Kunz medley I unearthed (which includes 'Walk Hand in Hand' - used in the film) lends itself well to that: it's not hard to picture, while listening to it, a young Monty at Oxford, dancing with a young lady, as he eyes 'Norman' in the corner.
But I digress. When it comes to Withnail and Marwood the question raised here tells us that we don't fully know the extent of their relationship, to which the sensible response, it seems to me, is: So what? Perhaps they don't either. Such is life.
The lion and the calf shall lie down together, but the calf won't get much sleep.
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