MY REVIEW OF 'SLUGS'

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SLUGS: THE MOVIE(1988)
(Directed by Juan Piquer Simon)

Plot: Slugs terrorize a small town……..Yes, you heard that correctly. Slugs terrorize a small town.

Review:

“Slugs” is a movie that at first glance, feels like a “Jaws” clone. I suppose it kind of is. The hero, Mike Brady isn’t the Sheriff, but he is the health inspector. While there is a Sheriff, who is arguably one of the most one dimensional *beep* Sheriff’s to appear in a movie….about killer slugs at least, the Sheriff is more of an antagonist to Mike. So really, Mike is enough like Chief Brody, then there is some scientist guy who is supposed to be like Hooper. I only wish there was some slug hunter, who would be like Quint. I’d expect him to be an exterminator, but the closest we get is a guy whose job is the clean out sewers. Now that I’ve gotten “Jaws” out of my system, let’s just say that this feels more like an 80’s splatter fest than a “Jaws” clone. Although I can see the similarities…..DAMMIT! MOVING ON!

“Slugs” is apparently based on a novel and gained a notorious reputation for being banned in Australia. I’m a bit surprised at this, as while “Slugs” is very gory, and somewhat mean spirited, I don’t know if its banning material. I mean, sure, “Cannibal Holocaust” I’d expect this from. But this movie is too silly to take seriously. Either way, here is my one and only compliment to the movie: It’s gory. I mean, it’s REALLY gory. Sure, the kills don’t happen enough(even though the structure only demands that lots of people die…..off-screen), but they’re pretty wet when they happen. This is my only dilemna, because I’m not sure if I enjoy this movie as much as other bad splatterfests, like “Blood Feast”. But I’m almost inclined to give it a slightly redeeming review just for the gore. Perhaps I’ll come to a more steady conclusion by the end of this review.

The movie begins with a couple on a boat in the water. The girl takes off her clothes(keeps her underwear on) and her boyfriend suddenly…..falls into the water? He’s supposed to be dragged under by the slugs, but it looks like he pushed himself in. Once again, what movie are we reminded of by this? It actually reminded me of “Great White”, but what the hell. We then see the title, “Slugs: The Movie”, and we laugh at the subtitle. Then some old guy gets killed(off-screen). We then meet Mike Brady, who has a sister named Marsha Brady……Oh wait, wrong Brady! Anyway, he talks with some disposable characters and the next day meets up with the douche Sheriff. This scene has a blatant continuity error in that the windows constantly change from open to closed. Anyway, they are going to the old dudes house. Not sure why the health inspector would be around to do this but I may have missed something. They find the dude dead and after a few more incidents, Mike begins to suspect that there may be a slug problem…….A MUTANT KILLER SLUG PROBLEM!

Anyway, nobody believes Mike. For once, I can understand why. Well, maybe not for once. Chief Brody seemed to be cracking up in “Jaws 2”, but that was also part of the point. The guy was cracking up, whether the shark was there or not. Here, we think that everyone should believe Mike, but the dude sounds like an idiot whenever he tries to explain itself. Here is an example of his dialogue: “Now maybe, just maybe, we're dealing with a mutant form of slug here, a kind that eats meat!”. Would you take such a man seriously?

Another flaw about this movie, which might seal it’s negative rating fate, is the inclusion of so many random and disposable minor characters. Most of the movie contains pointless characters getting killed. The most obvious example was the group of teens. Why were they there again? Well, to be killed of course. But did the movie need to be so blatant about it? I mean, we keep seeing them, but their only contribution to the plot is to die. However, what bothered me even more than the teens was that old couple in the green house. Why are there so many bottles of acid laying around? What was the point of the scene other than showing off gratuitous violence? Unfortunately, especially as not all the death scenes are gory, I can’t care about a movie with the script that just has minor characters being eaten……by slugs.

Whoever wrote this garbage clearly doesn’t know a lot……about anything. For example, early on at a crime scene, a cop talks about how the Coroner said that all the internal organs of the slug victim were missing. Would the coroner be there already and would they make that statement ON THE CRIME SCENE? Also, what was with that overcomplicated plan to destroy the slugs! Dude, buildings get destroyed and it looked like people could’ve been killed. Doesn’t salt kill slugs? Why not use that? Of course, maybe I’m the one who doesn’t know enough. But then again, maybe “Slugs: The Movie” is a classic in some place. You know, now that I think about it, the ending feels like a homage to “Them!”. In fact, now that I think about it, the movie feels more like a “Them!” clone than a “Jaws” clone.

The acting is pretty bad in general, and the dubbing feels off at times. Michael Garfield(Mike) isn’t a good actor, but at least he wasn’t boring. Philip MacHale(Don) is also pretty bad and becomes unintentionally amusing at times. Kim Terry(Kim) does okay as the wife.

On one hand, “Slugs: The Movie” is pretty fun in a gross-out, campy kind of way. But there is something about it that’s really unpleasant. Maybe the mean spirited tone it has at times just feels out of place? Maybe it’s the fact that there are too many poorly written characters? Or it could be that everyone is angry for no apparent reason. The result is a movie that balances “so bad it’s good” with “just bad in general”.

Violence: Rated R. Yes, it’s very gross at times.

Nudity: Rated R. During a sex scene, you see some female and male nudity. There is a fair amount of sexuality, but it somehow comes across as bland.

Overall: “Slugs: The Movie” is recommendable for fans with bad tastes, like me. It has the gore and the camp value, but either these movies are becoming tiring for me or the angry, annoying characters just rubbed me the wrong way. It’s bad, but not always in a good way.

1.5/4 Stars

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