'Revenge of the Ninja' review by MartialHorror.

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REVENGE OF THE NINJA(1983)
(Directed by Sam Firstenberg)

"Because that's what ninjas do.......dress dramatically and get revenge."- Signed by MartialHorror.

Plot: When his family is slaughtered, a ninja retires and moves to America with his young son. However, when he attracts the ire of drug runners, he must use his ninja skills to kick some ass.

Review:

The main reason I wanted to see “Revenge of the Ninja” was Sho Kosugi. I’m a huge sucker for cult-directors and cult-actors, especially if the actor is a martial arts star. Recently, he had somewhat of a revival with “Ninja Assassin”, playing the villain. I thought he was excellent, having presence and surprisingly solid acting. “Revenge of the Ninja” is generally considered his ‘best’ film, but it wasn’t the one I wanted to see. While not really a sequel, it’s generally considered the 2nd in a ‘trilogy’(following “Enter the Ninja” and proceeding “Ninja 3: Dominion”). I always try to avoid watching sequels before the originals, even if the two movies have little in common. I cried a little for watching “Dracula Has Risen From the Grave” before I could see “Dracula, Prince of Darkness”. But I just couldn’t find “Enter the Ninja”. Still, I was pretty excited. After all, I kept hearing how good this movie was. After watching it, I went back and checked all the reviews. No one actually used the word ‘good’. Sometimes they said how they loved it and sometimes they said how fun the movie was, but they never called it ‘good’. Because whether you like the movie or not, it’s not good……

We first meet Cho(Sho Kosugi) arguing with his Caucasian friend Braden(Arthur Roberts) because Braden wants Cho to come to America and run a Japanese antique shop. Cho refuses until his family is suddenly slaughtered by ninja…..in the broad freaking daylight. The only survivor is his son Kane(his real life son, Kane) and his Mother who will totally not die by the end of the movie. Cho and Braden dispatch the ninja and having nothing better to do, Cho agrees to Braden’s offer. So he moves to America and starts his antique shop(wow, this suddenly sounds fruity). He doesn’t realize that Braden is actually a douche and Is using the shop to peddle drugs. War sparks between Braden and Chifano(Mario Gallo, looking like a spoof of Joe Pesci, and who tragically passed away shortly after this movie was released), the local drug Lord. Cho and his son are dragged into the battle. To protect Kane, Cho must once again become a ninja.

When I say it’s not very good, I mean that it’s actually very bad. People say and do bizarre bad movie things. According to this movie, bullies have no problem trying to beat up a kid IN FRONT OF AN ADULT! As a testament to this issue, the movie doesn’t seem to know the relevance of the black ninja garb. It’s so when they attack at NIGHT, no one can see them. Attacking in day just makes you stick out like a sore thumb. The acting is extraordinarily awful, and there are no exceptions. At best, you have harmlessly bad(Sho Kosugi) to painfully bad(Kane Kosugi), with oddball bits of humor. I’m pretty sure Kane ad-libbed the “look, it’s superman” line and the gangster he was fighting was just playing along with it. The plot is typical for this type of movie and you know what will happen long before it happens. Oh no! Braden is the bad guy!? How shocking! That’s about as surprising as “Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” having Sir Ben Kingsley turn out to be the villain. The directing is mostly subpar. I wouldn’t call it good or bad, other than his poor handle on the actors(and was it just me or did characters say things when they’re mouths weren't moving?). Probably the films most annoying mistake though is that for a good portion of the film(especially the first half), Cho is noticeably absent. It was as if Braden, the antagonist, was the real protagonist. The hell!

The fight scenes themselves are a mixed bag. Sometimes they’re really bad, especially when you have a non-martial artist doing martial arts. But I also have to remember that this was 1983, and fight scenes weren’t as clean as they were now. Remember at this point, the major martial arts star was Chuck Norris. Norris seemed to know that good fight scenes weren’t easy to choreograph, so instead made action films with some karate in them. Considering that, I guess “Revenge of the Ninja” was pretty impressive for the time. Sometimes the fight scenes are pretty wild and creative. So I’d say as a martial arts film, it certainly isn’t bad as long as you’re okay with these somewhat dated fight scenes. This was about as good as America could produce at the time.

But if you’re a fan of this movie and are glaring at me with ninja hypno-eyes for panning the movie, let me assure you that I do kind of like it. No, it’s not in the same way that I like “Troll 2” either(the so bad, it’s good kind). For all it’s problems, the movie does offer an interesting cast of characters. Sure, they’re 80’s stereotypes, but they all intrigued me. The film also offers plenty of unusual scenarios. Watching a little kid fight a busty woman was pretty new, watching Sho Kosugi fight an offensive native American stereotype was pretty new, and watching two ninjas clash in the middle of the freaking day was…..well, not really new, but the final battle was pretty spectacular(where is Braden pulling all those life sized dolls from though?). I especially found it interesting that it’s never explained who killed Cho’s family or why. You almost think Braden may have set them up, but they never confirm this. In fact, Braden even is shown fighting some of them, so you presume that he had nothing to do with it. But most of all, it’s the 80’s sleaze that charmed me. There is enough nudity and plenty of extreme violence to please a sadist such as me. The movie only got a few things right, but for this type of movie, those few things were the necessities.

“Revenge of the Ninja” is a bad movie, but it still manages to be fast paced and entertaining. For a movie called “Revenge of the Ninja”, that’s all I ask of it. I’m sure I would’ve been more enthusiastic if I was reviewing this in 1983, where the fight scenes probably would’ve impressed me more. But I had some fun, amidst all the crap. Even though I referred to Kosugi as a bad actor, he’s not a waste of time. He does have a certain presence about him and is interesting to watch. I’ll certainly try to check out more of his work. But if “Revenge of the Ninja” is his best movie, then that must say a lot about the rest of his movies. Yet the less-than-respectable part of me can’t wait to see more boobies, flying limbs and ninja action.

Violence: Rated R worthy. Hell yeah! Plenty of brutal, mean spirited blood shedding.

Nudity: Some, although one scene is an attempted rape.

Overall: “Revenge of the Ninja” is both glorious and awful. I’d recommend it as long as you know what you’re getting into.

2/4 Stars



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