Problem with the plot


Was there any reason to have everyone race the same day, especially if the whole punch card system was in place?

Why would they be required to be on the move simultaneously, if they were going to time everyone individually and separately anyway? Wouldn't that kind of mess just get in the way of fairness (for example, by introducing queuing to the proceedings, that can affect the times)?

I mean, couldn't they simply time everyone separately, on different days, and then see, who did it the fastest?

I kinda hate that we never got to see anyone's times. I wanted to know how different Seymour's time was to the fake priest's times, for example.

Also, isn't the whole 'equalizer' thing with the brawl and the roadblock and whatnot, kind of defeating the purpose anyway? What kind of RACE is it, if everyone is basically equalized at one point? They could have friggin' WALKED there, as long as they get there before the road block is cleared. It didn't matter who got there fast, or how fast they got there, because basically, at that point, everyone's time reset. They should have punched the cards right there, and punched again when they left, and introduced the 5-minute intervals again (for fairness and accuracy).

What's the point of making sure they all arrive pretty much simultaneously, especially if the whole punch card system is in place - what's the whole point of the punch cards, if a) the movie makes sure they all are equalized near the end and thus arrive pretty much at the same time and b) if the FASTEST RUNNER wins anyway?

They should never have introduced the whole punch card system, but just put everyone to leave at the same time from the same line, and stated: "Whoever gets there first, by any means they can figure out, even by running, wins!", and then just painted a line on the asphalt, and whoever crosses it first, wins.

The punch card has ABSOLUTELY NO MEANING if the fastest runner wins at the end.

If "I was here first" is how they win, then WHY SHOULD THEY NEED TO PUNCH THE CARD AT ALL?

So the Lamborghini hags won, but who was second? Who was third? By how many seconds was the difference? It's like everyone stopped caring at that point.

Also, why isn't the victor celebrated?

Plus, what was the prize for winning, the whole point of the race (and thus, the movie)? Uh.. nothing? NOTHING happened, when the hag punched the card? Was she even declared a winner? Did she receive champagne and a bag of money? Was she declared to be the best racer on the planet? Did she break a record? (I have to admit, I didn't pay full attention at the end, because it was so stupid and illogical, so some of these might have happened, but it was surely under-emphazised, because I didn't even notice it)

What's the point of winning, if THAT is all you get - a crowd focusing on someone else, and not caring about your win at all, and you not getting any recognition, prestige, money, prize, attention, or even a friggin' trophy, diploma or declaration of your win.

By the way, dogs shouldn't be "babied", and what the poodle woman did (and also, what Captain Chaos did) was actually detrimental to the poodle, psychologically speaking. Well, 'Dog Whisperer' didn't exist yet as a TV show, but people should still know about dog psychology before getting a dog.

I am amazed that Kennels and other places will SELL people dogs without first making sure they understand at least the BASICS OF DOG PSYCHOLOGY (it's very different from human psychology), and that they know that dogs should ABSOLUTELY NOT BE "BABIED".

But women think of dogs as small babies, because they have constant baby rabies that MUST be satisfied by some way, if they can't have their own. Once their own kids grow beyond 2 years of age, women lose interest and start wanting 'more babies'. Women would want an 'eternal baby' if they could have it.

So EVERYTHING becomes a replacement for a 'baby', women see the world like The Terminator, except that their targeting system is constantly looking for "things to "baby"" (yes, it's so bad that the word 'baby' has become a friggin' VERB!). A dog! A cat! A teddy bear! A too-old kid! A porcelain giraffe! It doesn't matter what it is, as long as it can be 'BABIED'.

And to heck with the psychology or actual NEEDS a of said 'babying target'. If a dog needs a strong pack leader and lots of exercize, fúck that - I am keeping the dog in my bag and force it to wear hats and 'shoes', because it LOOKS SO CUTE and I want to 'BABY'! Then I pamper and pamper it and when the dog becomes neurotic and psychotic, I can't understand it, because I gave it so much llloooooooove (which is just emotional lust that you selfishly satisfied by another living being's expense without even finding out what the 'target' would really need) it! It's my BABY! (It's NOT. Get over it.)

I really don't want to ever incarnate to a woman's body.. if I ever become like that, just shoot me in the neck, please.

reply

Plot??????? Do you realize you're on the Cannonball Run page? Seriously, whatever meds you stopped taking, please get back on them.

reply

I wondered that same thing. The babes in the Lamborghini and JJ n Victor started the clock at different times. So the foot race at the end was pointless, as the babes would have a quicker time even if Captain Chaos punched in first.

But then you realise, plot isn't what this movie was about. The actors where just having a lot of fun.

reply

Sometimes you just need to pop open a beer and relax, rather than deconstruct what was just a fun slapstick car movie...


reply

It's a race. You think the organizers want to hire people to sit at checkpoints year round just in case someone wants to race that day? Don't be absurd. It has to happen all in the course of a couple of days.

reply

This movie could definitely use a streamlined fan edit.

reply

You boys need to relax and watch the bouncy boobs and cars ... It'll b ok

reply

It's been a year since you asked, but in case you still care (or someone else finds this thread and does care...), here's my take on your questions...

Was there any reason to have everyone race the same day, especially if the whole punch card system was in place?


So they race under the same conditions (weather, road blocks, etc...). Sure, the punch card system makes everyone racing on different days do-able, but then, there wouldn't have been a movie.

It's like everyone stopped caring at that point.


Actually, they did. After McClure makes everyone fall down, everyone else is happy that Chaos "ruined" it for him. In any case, no one wants to complete a road race on foot, not to mention the entire group being stopped (by the construction work and biker gang) and forced to wait together so close to the finish line made the entire race sort of irrelevant. And since everyone teamed up against the bikers, there's little to no animosity left between participants, in my opinion.

Also, why isn't the victor celebrated?


I'm assuming they still get their prize money, but in any case, the same points I just made about the *beep* ending apply here too.

Did she receive champagne and a bag of money?


I'm pretty sure there was prize money for the winners, not to mention participants were allowed to place bets on the race. That said, they certainly don't put any emphasis on that at the end of the movie.

What's the point of winning, if THAT is all you get - a crowd focusing on someone else, and not caring about your win at all, and you not getting any recognition, prestige, money, prize, attention, or even a friggin' trophy, diploma or declaration of your win.


The participants don't look like they care about much in life, most look to be beyond "wealthy", some are even already famous. In any case, a real life equivalent is the Gumball 3000 race, which actually requires participants to pay a fee to participate, £35k this year, for the Dublin to Bucharest race. I couldn't find any information regarding a prize money for the winners of that race... It's all about bragging rights.

By the way, dogs shouldn't be "babied", and what the poodle woman did (and also, what Captain Chaos did) was actually detrimental to the poodle, psychologically speaking.


It is set in 1981. People nowadays are expected to treat their pets better than people treated their own kids, back then. Different times... Today's standards simply don't apply to the early '80s.

Women would want an 'eternal baby' if they could have it.


One could argue that some people are born with mental and/or physical conditions that effectively makes them behave/look/develop like a baby for their entire life. Not every mother is happy to have to care for an "eternal baby" for their entire life..., but I get your point and it certainly applies to women who treat their dogs like babies.

I really don't want to ever incarnate to a woman's body.. if I ever become like that, just shoot me in the neck, please.


It's not like every woman was that exact stereotype you make them out to be...

reply

Next up... Cannonball Run II. Frank Sinatra enters the race on its final leg of the journey.... Take it away, OP

reply