Favorite Lines

"Spalding, get your foot off the boat!"

Pretty much anything Ty Webb says - here's a few of my favourites:

Ty Webb: "Oh Danny, this isn't Russia. Is this Russia? This isn't Russia is it?"

Judge Smails: "You should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. He's been club champion three years running and I'm no slouch myself."
Ty Webb: "Don't sell yourself short Judge - you're a tremendous slouch."

Danny Noonan: "Unbelievable."
Ty Webb: "Thankyou very little."

Lacey Underalls: "My uncle says you've got a screw loose."
Ty Webb: "Yeah well, your uncle molests collies."

Dr. Beeper: "Oh Webb oh man - I didn't see your name on the sign-in sheet for the club tournament. I thought you'd be the man to beat this year."
Ty Webb: "Guess you'll just have to keep beating yourself."

Al Czervik: "I don't understand it. I'm playing the worse game of my life!"
Ty Webb: "Hey don't put yourself down Al. You're not er... You're not good. You stink."

Danny Noonan: "Ty, I saw Smails before - he was cheating."
Ty Webb: "Nobody likes a tell-tale Danny. Except of course, me."

Ty Webb: "Me winning isn't. You do."

"A flute with no holes is not a flute...And a donut with no holes is a Danish...nanananana....tatatatatata"

"Do you know why he got kicked out, Danny?..He was nightputting. He was putting. At night. On the 15 year-old daughter of the dean."

"Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga Galunga. Gunga Lagunga. We get to the 18 and he's going to stiff me. I say 'Hey Lama! What about a little bit for the effort?' He said, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your death bed you will receive total consciousness. So I got that going for me, which is nice."

"I guess you don't. I guess you don't."

"Miss it Noonan, miss it. Miss! Miss! "Noonan!" "Miss it Noonan. Miss! Miss! Miss it! Ahhhhh" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OophxEckcu0

FORE! **Hits judge smails in the balls** I SHOULDA YELLED TWO!

"What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?"

"Hey everybody, we're all gonna get laid!"

"Don't be obsessed with your desires Danny. The Zen philosopher, Basho, once wrote, 'A flute with no holes, is not a flute. A donut with no hole, is a Danish.' He was a funny guy."

"You'll get nothing, and like it!"

Kid on bike "Where you going?"
Charlie Bright "Somewhere".

"It slipped!"