Your favorite lines

"Your son looks like a f@g to me."

"Never play 'Lady of Spain' again!!"

"These guys are a *beep* i n' disgrace!"

"Dunlap, you suck cock."

"I'm gonna get some snatch by the pool."

"Here's to all that glourious snatch in F-L-A."

"That's right! I LIKE pussy!"

"Hey Hanrahan! Hanrahan! Suzanne sucks pussy!"

"Oh no. Never never."

"Ooooh-wned, OOOOH-wned!!"

...and of course...

"Hey Reg, that reminds me. I was coaching in Omaha in '54 and Eddie Shore sends me this kid who's a real chronic masturbater...I mean, he'd take delibrate penalties so he could get in the box all by himself and DAMNED if he didn't...mmm mmm mmmh mmmph. What was his name? Mmm mmm mmm mmmh mmmph!!"

"How'd ya know my name was Mac?" - Mac

puttin' on the foil, coach

I laughed so hard I cried and held my ribs...


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" What are the 39 steps? "
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CARR: And here's Ned Braden. He's a college graduate... and an American citizen!


LEMIEUX: Ogletorpe?!?

See this quarter Reggie, it used to be a nickel
I found this a pretty clever jab at Reggies age and years in the leauge

If time is not true, what purpose have watchmakers?

"Those guys are retards... they brought their *beep* toys with em"

"I tried to capture the sprit of the thing"

I like the bit when McCraken goes over to the ref when Ned's stripping and says this is a serious game and the ref says "serious game? what do you mean what are you talking about? this is hockey!"

"My rule of thumb is, what Siskel and Ebert like, I don't, and vice versa." David Lynch

- the team's in the bar drinking
'killer' (but pre his renaming himself) carlson reads a newspaper story the team's getting sold to florida owners
the players and customers start trading barbs
an old man starts singing these words to the tune 'stranger in paradise':

'cut off my balls ill be skating in flor-i-daaaaaa'
that is hilarious

- players at ice show woman skater trying to catch up
w/ other women skaters going around in circle
horny moe making his usual horndog comments
denis the goalie says: 'morris you make me sick (pronouned 'seeeek')

- players checking into road motel hanson bros upset they cant 3 to a room
dunlop's on the phone across the lobby cut to his point of view
the hansons dragging the checkin clerk over the counter and stuffing him upside down in a tree planter
(disclaimer: im a comedy snob and prefer cerebral humor but there're always exceptions to any rule <grin>)


- denis is on the phone demanding a trade braden's nearby playing cards
denis cant remember the english word for 'trade' or how to demand a trade either
he asks braden's help braden says 'trade me now' denis repeats braden's words then braden says, 'now hang up' denis slams phone down

- dunlop storming up stairs to gm's office after seeing hansons for first time
dunlop:'theyre retards!'
gm: 'at least they dont play w/ themselves'
dunlop: 'theyre too dumb to play w/ themselves'


- denis staggering into the locker room after the 1st period of the title game
arms still flailing away at imaginary slap shots, wrist shots, rebounds, breakaways ...
oh that killed me first time

more too but im typed out right now ...
anyway tho ...

these are all mere warm ups of course to the single funniest scene ive ever watched... which is of course the introduction of the outlaw ringer skaters the chiefs opponents have signed up for the title game
i remember seeing listening to that in the movie theatre when i saw slap shot the first time it just kept getting funnier and funnier (and scarier and scarier)
w/o a doubt as funny as anything ive ever seen but by that point in the movie
i was completely taken by the flick - in love with it
and like reggie 'im a lover not a fighter' but when in roma ... (or at least when in the darkened safety of a movie house if id been on the chiefs bench witnessing those guys getting announced there'd a been a puddle between my skates - from a combination of laughter and fright <grin again>)

yeah slap shot is a laff riot easily one of the funniest movies of all time
but only as a movie of course - goon hockey aint hockey 'eh?

Hyannisport broadcaster: "The fans are standing up to them! The security guards are standing up to them! The peanut vendors are standing up to them! And by golly, if I could get down there, I'd be standing up to them!"

Frank: Just a man.
Harmonica: An ancient race.