MovieChat Forums > The Heartbreak Kid (1972) Discussion > PART ONE: The Scene in the Miami Restaur...

PART ONE: The Scene in the Miami Restaurant with (Left to Right) Albert, Lindley, Shepard and Grodin


There are lots of funny scenes and funny lines in The Heartbreak Kid(not to mention a streak of cruelty towards Wife Number One that is only leavened slightly by the humor.)

But perhaps the best overall comedy scene in the film...perfectly set up to build and build and build to big laughs -- is when Lenny(Charles Grodin) elects to sit down with the object of his affection(the beautiful but somewhat bland and decidedly spoiled Cybill Shepard), her pleasant, attractive mother(Audra Lindley) and her strong, white-maned and unforgiving father(Eddie Albert) ...and somehow seek to convince Albert to give up his daughter's hand in marriage to a man who has just dumped his wife on his honeymoon in favor of this newly discovered blonde shiksa hottie.

Director Elaine May stages this as a long one-take scene, in a tight shot on the four principles.Left to right: Albert, Lindley, Shepard, and Grodin.

Whlie Grodin carries almost all of the dialogue for most of the scene, the other three "do their thing" with facial acting. Shepard is perhaps the most expressive, going from embarrassed to intrigued to amused to worried. Lindley gives the essence of the "well behaved rich society mother" at first confused, then conciilatory, then shocked at Grodin's pitch.

But Eddie Albert...ah Eddie Albert...doing a long, slow, tempered burn of fatherly contempt...the big laughs come from watching his face darken and waiting, just WAITING for his response to Grodin's pitch: "Would you be so kind as to give your daughter's hand in marriage to me, sir?"

Albert: Not if a team of horses were tied to my tongue and dragged me down the street...

..and that's just the beginning.

This "four-person one shot scene" was so central to The Heartbreak Kid that not only was it the centerpiece of the trailer shown in theaters, but when ABC television later showed the film on its Sunday Night Movie, a still frame of the foursome was used throughout the broadcast at commercial breaks to "summarize" the film.

A classic one-take comedy scene.

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In an imaginary sequel, Daddy Corcoran sets Lenny up in Minnesota politics, putting his son-in-law's bullshitting skills to good use for he and his business cronies. Lenny's ability to lay down the bovine excrement is the only thing Eddie Albert's character had any respect for.

Just watched it for the first time on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vusvJaxKZFo

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Ha...well a lot of Lenny's lines (even stolen like about the cauliflower) would probably work for a politician and a man or woman running for office has to be persistent and non-truthful....

Irony: Minnesota politics are sure different today than in 1972.

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He certainly had the cauliflower and potato farmer vote all sown up.

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Crucial in Minnesota...

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Funniest scene in the movie. When Mr. Corcoran delivers his initial salvo in response and Lenny just goes, "I respect your candor," I nearly peed. Lenny's a heel and a schmuck, but I'll give him this much: he is 100% telling the truth when he says he's determined.

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Funniest scene in the movie.

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Pretty much so. Its one of those great scenes where the joke is set up early -- Lenny's making this outrageous request, how is Mr. Corcoran going to react? You just keep laughing and laughing BEFORE the reaction.

The scene with the pecan pie in the restaurant where Lenny dumps Wife Number One is at once extremely funny and extremely cruel and sad. Whether firing employees or firing spouses...its never good.

Later on in Minnesota, the FINAL Grodin-Albert comedy scene is set up with Grodin's dinner time talk of cauliflowers meets with soup-sipping silence from Albert...and a later scene in which Albert quietly tells him he's impressed, he's never heard such a "crock of shit" in his life. I'm laughing remembering it.



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When Mr. Corcoran delivers his initial salvo in response and Lenny just goes, "I respect your candor," I nearly peed. Lenny's a heel and a schmuck, but I'll give him this much: he is 100% telling the truth when he says he's determined.

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Lenny's determined, Mr. Corcoran is determined ("You think you're determined...I'm a BRICK WALL." ) Its a great story, one for the ages on a small scale, in how it ends.

And Eddie Albert got one of those Oscar nominations you always HOPE someone will get, but rarely do.

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A BIG part of the comedy, for me, is the level, logical, calm delivery that Grodin brings to the table (literally and figuratively). He plays it so straight and the absurdity of it - the incongruity between his delivery and the statement made - that's making me bust a gut.

The pecan pie scene is as you say: runs from hilarious to tragic - often in the same moment. Don't know if I should laugh or cry and wind up kinda doing both. Even his pathetic attempts to "soften the blow" with a delicious meal ("Isn't this worth waiting for?") was cringy, funny, brutal, and sad.

The thing that impresses me most about the movie is that understated, grounded, tragicomic blend it's got. '70s had some great comedies this way (Annie Hall, Manhattan). It isn't used nowadays. More recent, "zany" comedies had me conditioned to the point where I was almost thinking the dad was going to yoink Lenny by his tie and bang his head into the table or something. Funny - but not as effective. Not that I hate zany comedies. Love the Marx Brothers and Monty Python. It's just fun to have both.

The standoff between father and prospective son-in-law is great.

The ending is BRILLIANT.

This movie probably should have been nominated for/won more awards.

Oh, and Elaine May should have been handed the reigns to a thousand more movies. Boo studios for suffering through one Ishtar and ignoring all previous brilliance in favour of kiboshing any future endeavours.

I first heard about this film from a Jerry Seinfeld interview where he lists his favourite comedy films. This was his favourite, on premise alone it seemed. The audacity of Lenny is what makes him laugh (he cracks up a bit just describing it), and on that recommendation I checked it out. Watching the movie, I can 100% see George-as-Lenny (or vice-versa). This would have been the way George's marriage to Susan would have ended, had it happened. I know George is based on Larry David to some extent, but this scenario is totally "George".

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A BIG part of the comedy, for me, is the level, logical, calm delivery that Grodin brings to the table (literally and figuratively). He plays it so straight and the absurdity of it - the incongruity between his delivery and the statement made - that's making me bust a gut.

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Well, "deadpan" has been a great comedy style from Jack Benny through Nichols and May through Bob Newhart through Seinfeld through Christopher Guest, I suppose(and I'm sure I"ve missed a few along the way.)

Against deadpan , we have All in the Family, Jim Carrey(especially Dumb and Dumber)....Jerry Lewis(back in the day.) But laughs are laughs I suppose.

I prefer deadpan.

Given that Mike Nichols and an ultra-deadpan Dustin Hoffman had made movie history with The Graduate in 1967, The Heartbreak Kid came weighted with expectation as the second partner in Nichols and May made HER movie : were Nichols and Hoffman to be replaced by May and Grodin? The short answer was: no. But The Heartbreak Kid came with its own brand of comedy AND bleakness, all covered by deadpan.

Weirdly, The Heartbreak Kid could also be advertised as "written by Neil Simon" but it seems that he didn't really get the credit for the comic tone of the film. He probably didn't deserve it -- this is on a much higher plane that The Odd Couple or Barefoot in the Park(much as I enjoyed the former.) The REAL credit evidently lay with the short story writer(Bruce Jay Friedman), May, and her cast.


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The pecan pie scene is as you say: runs from hilarious to tragic - often in the same moment. Don't know if I should laugh or cry and wind up kinda doing both. Even his pathetic attempts to "soften the blow" with a delicious meal ("Isn't this worth waiting for?") was cringy, funny, brutal, and sad.

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Its the kind of scene I don't think they would consider filming anymore...too cruel.

BTW, I know that there is a remake of The Heartbreak Kid, but the casting looked all wrong to me and I assume that it has no real match for the pecan pie scene or the stuff with the Father from Hell. I never read much good about it.

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I love the way Grodin hassles the waiter on and on and ON about "What?! No pecan pie? We CAME for the pecan pie!!" and then when the waiter finally brings it at the end...Grodin doesn't give a damn about his "fake need" and pushes it away. Again, I'm laughing just thinking about it.

Trivia: that young, innocent waiter was played by Erik Preminger , the "illegitimate son" of Famous Bald Director Otto Preminger and stripper Gypsy Rose Lee(way to GO, Otto!) Evidently, Lee kept this secret for many years before allowing father and son to meet, somehow the son got into the movie business and into this one classic scene.

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The standoff between father and prospective son-in-law is great.

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We don't realize for awhile that the CORE of the movie is going to be Lenny's need to confront and overcome the father. We first think the movie is about Lenny and his new wife(Jeannie Berlin, Elaine May's daughter -- a bit of cruel casting, yes?), and then about Lenny and Cybill Shepard(so beautiful, so vacuous) but no...the comedy gold is Lenny versus Albert. Like that early scene where Albert tries to get his boat unmoored from the dock before Lenny can jump aboard...a first "clue" that Daddy don't like this pushy, well -- Jew. (The WASP /Jew thing is strong here.)


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The ending is BRILLIANT.

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The ending we have ALL confronted in our lives: "Be careful what you wish for...you might get it."

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This movie probably should have been nominated for/won more awards.

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Fox put it out during the "old time Oscar season" -- Xmas. As I recall, at Christmas, Fox pushed The Poseidon Adventure as their commercial hit and The Heartbreak Kid as their Oscar bait. But it was a tough Oscar year, with The Godfather and Cabaret, etc. Hard for comedy to break through.

Eddie Albert really lucked out. The 1972 Best Supporting Actor category was three guys from The Godfather(Pacino, Caan, Duvall) the mime guy from Cabaret(Joel Grey,the ultimate winner) and....all by himself, Eddie from Green Acres?

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Oh, and Elaine May should have been handed the reigns to a thousand more movies. Boo studios for suffering through one Ishtar and ignoring all previous brilliance in favour of kiboshing any future endeavours.

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Well -- and taking it with a grain of salt, yes -- Elaine May seemed to have one of those destructive reputations -- took her movies over budget and schedule, wouldn't stop filming scenes, turned in overlong prints.

And yet...such a funny handful of movies.

A New Leaf has always intrigued me. You've got Walter Matthau(then a very big star; people forget) playing against type as a rich blue blood who has gone broke and who marries bookish wallflower Elaine May simply to kill her and get her money. The movie as we have it is a charming comical love story and Matthau elects not to kill May, but to live happily ever after.

That's not the movie Elaine May shot. She shot a movie where Matthau DOES kill May, and at least one other person(conniving lawyer Jack Weston.) Paramount took THAT movie away from May over her protest. And its a hard call. The movie we got is nice and charming and has a happy ending. I'm not sure I would have liked one where Matthua DID kill May( which sounds more 70's, in any event.)

"Mikey and Nicky" filming and editing went on forever.

And when May got Ishtar will fellow mad director Warren Beatty...it was preordained. Not only did May and Beatty film scene after scene over and over, they kinda did it on PURPOSE to ruin the career of a studio boss they hated (David Putnam.)

All this "behind the scenes gossip" is what it is, but the fact is, they took May's directing career away and instead let her carry on as a script doctor. She's also funny in a Woody Allen movie.

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I first heard about this film from a Jerry Seinfeld interview where he lists his favourite comedy films. This was his favourite, on premise alone it seemed. The audacity of Lenny is what makes him laugh (he cracks up a bit just describing it), and on that recommendation I checked it out. Watching the movie, I can 100% see George-as-Lenny (or vice-versa). This would have been the way George's marriage to Susan would have ended, had it happened. I know George is based on Larry David to some extent, but this scenario is totally "George".

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HA. I knew nothing of that. But you can surely see the ghost of The Heartbreak Kid lingering over Seinfeld in general and George in particular. George and Kramer in particular were always pushing on in outrageous ways that somehow screwed up the lives of all the people they met -- romantic women, included.

Quite the "key" to Seinfeld, there. Excellent information.

PS. It is often assumed in writings and posts that Eddie Albert relented and let Lenny marry his daughter because as a smart man, he figured the marriage would break up and Lenny would become "the enemy," but -- the movie elects to leave that open ended. Lenny SUCCEEDED. He got Cybill to break from her father and even to force her father to ACCEPT Lenny. There might be kids ahead. Eddie might HAVE to fund Lenny's business plans in some way. After all, Eddie had to make a big public show of the wedding. Unhappiness may lie ahead, but not divorce.

PPS. Both The Graduate and The Heartbreak Kid end with a wedding scene, yes?

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I love all kinds of comedy. At their best, they comment on society and "reveal truth" and make me howl. You can critique romance, aimlessness, and finding your place in life like this film, or you can go broad with slapstick satire in Modern Times - why choose?

Laughs are laughs, yes. It doesn't matter if I'm laughing convulsively because of a deadpan monologue that references philosophy or because John Cleese has a silly walk.

It's interesting that the credits read "Neil Simon's The Heartbreak Kid" when he didn't direct it or write the original story. I'd like to read the story, see if the comedy is on the page already. Obviously, the film is a team effort (Simon, May, and the cast). May clearly deserves a lot of the credit; her comic sensibilities definitely are present in THK.

We still have appetite for cruel comedy. In a mainstream release they might not, but the indie market would still do this kind of cruel-funny-sad thing.

Yes, it's not really about Lenny's relationships, but I'm not sure it's about the father, either. It's about Lenny's looking for meaning in all the wrong places, this discomfort with himself that he won't/can't confront so he buries it in petty conflicts.

I didn't know Lyla was May's daughter, but that makes so much sense. Jeannie Berlin's performance reminded me of May; I thought May might have encouraged it or just subconsciously found somebody who had similar comic sensibilities, but it's a lot closer to home than that, apparently.

A New Leaf is a great movie; I don't know that I would have liked May's version better, but it would have been a bold, bold move - a dark comedy instead of a charming rom-com. It could have been great, too.

Maybe May should have been given more movies with stricter control. Keep her in-budget a bit, don't give her final edit?

I liked her in A Crisis in Six Scenes, too (underrated and fun). So she's got a couple good Woody Allen credits.

Agreed. "Mr. Corcoran won" isn't quite right. Maybe he relented thinking/hoping the marriage would implode, but that can't be what he would consider a victory. Surely he'd have stopped it if he could have. I'm not sure that they stay together at the end, but I don't think divorce is inevitable; it will certainly last long enough for Lenny to annoy his father-in-law with business ventures.

Not only do The Graduate and THK both end with weddings, they both have that very similar malaise over the whole thing. They're both incredibly nuanced endings.

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I love all kinds of comedy. At their best, they comment on society and "reveal truth" and make me howl. You can critique romance, aimlessness, and finding your place in life like this film, or you can go broad with slapstick satire in Modern Times - why choose?

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No need to choose -- different types of comedy work in different ways. You've got your physical slapstick comedy -- I'll go with Blake Edwards in The Great Race, The Party AND his Pink Panther Clouseaus. The meanness and cruelty of The Three Stooges rather scared me as a child, but the older I got, the funnier they were. And Original Curly was some kind of comic genius.

But good deadpan, witty one-liner comedy is fun, too. Bill Murray's Dalai Lama speech in Caddyshack, with its carefully thought out improv at the end..."so I've got THAT going for me...which is nice."

I like the scene in Animal House after Flounder's brother's car has been half destroyed. Flounder is crying like a baby so the other guys try to cheer him up.

Belushi does the physical humor (smashing a beer bottle over his head), the suave Tim Matheson gets the amiable, reassuring line:

"Hey, don't worry about it. You f'ed up...you trusted us."

And Bruce McGill's D-Day fires up a noisy blow torch: "Just leave everything to me."

Its several TYPES of comedy, several LEVELS of comedy in one scene. (And as with all good movie one-liners, I have carried 'You 'fed up...you trusted us" through life with me. Sometimes modified to "You f'ed up...you trusted ME.")


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Laughs are laughs, yes. It doesn't matter if I'm laughing convulsively because of a deadpan monologue that references philosophy or because John Cleese has a silly walk.

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Yes. I tell you what I've missed in recent years though -- because of COVID closures recently but before then because of too much "comedy on TV" -- the sound of a full-house audience laughing so hard you can't hear the lines on the screen, the GROUP participation.

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It's interesting that the credits read "Neil Simon's The Heartbreak Kid" when he didn't direct it or write the original story.

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Yes. That's VERY interesting to me. In the early 70's, Neil Simon was a perhaps TOO revered name in comedy. It was The Odd Couple movie in 1968 that did it -- it was a true blockbuster, one of the biggest movies of the year, and suddenly everything Neil Simon did was considered to be a Big Event. He ruled Broadway -- in NYC where magazines like Time and Newsweek were based to they covered his every play. And then his plays would go to Hollywood (Plaza Suite, The Sunshine Boys), though sometimes he'd get an original story made for the screen ("The Out of Towners," which is far more of a horror movie than a comedy to me.)

But here's the thing: as the 70's continued, Neil Simon started looking more "old hat" as new comedy talents came around. Woody Allen and Mel Brooks for a few years. And then the "SNL onslaught."

And here's the other thing: Simon clearly wrote The Heartbreak Kid but it doesn't feel like his kind of comedy at all. Auteuristic critics gave the kudos to Director Elaine May, and, indeed, the ads pushed the short story writer Bruce Jay Friedman. The suggestion was "hey, this movie is too hip to be solely a Neil Simon concoction." I don't know that for sure, but it FELT like it in 1972.

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I'd like to read the story, see if the comedy is on the page already. Obviously, the film is a team effort (Simon, May, and the cast). May clearly deserves a lot of the credit; her comic sensibilities definitely are present in THK.

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Its funny. One wonders if May(who would become a script doctor once directing jobs dried up) was able to re-write the script. Probably not -- Neil Simon was sacrosanct in those days. Well, he likely wrote a lot of those hilarious one-liners but May fashioned the comedy. And the STORY wasn't Simon's -- he was in the service of something far more nasty and bleak than he usually wrote (less The Out of Towners!)

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We still have appetite for cruel comedy. In a mainstream release they might not, but the indie market would still do this kind of cruel-funny-sad thing.

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Yes, though The Heartbreak Kid was a 20th Century Fox movie, it had that "indie" feel of many 70s films...tough, cynical, a bit downbeat through the laughs.

The movie is most cruel to Lila, Wife Number One, but hidden within that cruelty is the REALITY of how irritating she is, and how Lenny just may be better off dealing with it now. A lot of people "go through" with marriages that they should not have taken on....its only a few years to divorce (in Hollywood, sometimes, a few MONTHS.) Why not end it on the honeymoon?

But once Lenny dumps Lila, he becomes rather the "victim" of a man (Albert) who truly looks down on him. "Lenny is Mr. Corcoran's Lila." We're ALL being judged.

As for "cruel comedy" in general, it certainly dates back to Abbott and Costello(Abbott's always mean to Costello) and the Stooges(Moe's mean to everybody but he gets it back) There is a "friendly" cruelty to Matheson's "You f'ed up, you trusted us" line in Animal House.

Perhaps the cruelest comedy of all was "MASH the Movie" in which blood-soaked Korean War field surgeons(Sutherland and Gould) imposed all sorts of cruel comedy humiliations on their bureaucratic foes, man and woman alike. In 1970, this was par for the nihilist course. Modernly, that movie looks MEAN -- certainly as compared to the rather soft and cute TV series that followed it.

I'm not as "up" on the classic comics(Chaplin, Keaton and the rest) as I once was, but certainly their films had some rough stuff mixed in with the sweet.

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But back to The Heartbreak Kid. If its cruelty comes down directly on Lila, its jaundiced view eventually comes down on everybody (I recall LA Times critic Charles Champlin writing of the film's viewpoint: "A pox on all your houses.") It ends with the "happy occasion" of a wedding about which, we sense -- NO ONE is happy.

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Yes, it's not really about Lenny's relationships, but I'm not sure it's about the father, either.

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Well, there are a lot of scenes WITHOUT the father -- Lenny concocting that ridiculous story about a road wreck for Lila, the pecan pie scene; Lenny dispatching Cybilll's college football hunks; the "sex scene" (pretty hot and real) between Lenny and Cybill -- but I think we are all most drawn to the comparatively few "Grodin vs Albert" scenes. That's where the comedy juice is..perhaps more for guys. And..the Academy remembered Albert. (I think Jeannie Berlin got a nom, too.)

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It's about Lenny's looking for meaning in all the wrong places, this discomfort with himself that he won't/can't confront so he buries it in petty conflicts.

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That's a good insight. This felt then like a very sophisticated movie, I myself can't say that I saw EVERYTHING in it. The issue here is to what extent Lenny is a "likeable protagonist" at all. Sorta, kinda. He wins the unwinnable goal(Cybill). He gets to have sex with her(a big "way to go!" from the guys in the audience.) He DOES stand up to Albert(though with some comedy, as he boasts of military duty and then reveals no, he really didn't have it tough.) He'd be the hero in a traditional romantic comedy -- for "winning the girl" -- but we don't really find him a hero at all. When he's sitting there at the end -- talking his fake talk with little KIDS...ah, its the final chuckle.

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I didn't know Lyla was May's daughter, but that makes so much sense. Jeannie Berlin's performance reminded me of May; I thought May might have encouraged it or just subconsciously found somebody who had similar comic sensibilities, but it's a lot closer to home than that, apparently.

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Alfred Hitchcock had a slightly homely daughter named Patricia(who COULD look cute) who wanted to be an actress. He cast her in three of his films, but "according to type": mousy, obnoxious, unattractive (compared to gorgeous Janet Leigh in Psycho). You could say Hitchcock was being mean to his own daughter, but he was really saying: "I'm casting you correctly and therefore you will be good."

When Elaine May cast her daughter (with a different last name) in Hearbreak Kid, there was some of the same feeling: the mother was mean in casting the daughter as a pretty messy specimen but got a GREAT performance out of her, plus inevitable echoes of HERSELF. (May could have played the role either 10 years earlier or even in 1972, maybe.)

BTW, as I understand it, in the remake with Ben Stiller, Lila was cast with a hottie (Malin Akerman) who revealed horrible personality traits. That seems a bit more broad to me. Lila in The Heartbreak Kid is not a hottie, but she's not ugly, either, she has some sex appeal, a nice body, etc. She's a mix -- as we all are -- of the attractive and unattractive, of the good and the bad.

In fact, as much was we can understand Lenny dumping Lila in some ways, a BETTER man would have made that marriage work and gotten used to Lila's quirks and had a good marriage. That's not Lenny's wavelength.

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A New Leaf is a great movie; I don't know that I would have liked May's version better, but it would have been a bold, bold move - a dark comedy instead of a charming rom-com. It could have been great, too.

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I like the movie as we have it -- no murders, happy ending. (You could say that Matthau decides to KEEP his Lila.)

I'm rather haunted by the knowledge that the original HAD the murders and that evidently Matthau got away with them. Its all fiction, but I rather don't like thinking about that version.

Up thread, I spoke of the joy of a full house audience laughing hard. You get that in A New Leaf in the scene where Matthau (rather calmly and nicely) tries to help May get into her "one arm-hole Grecian nightgown" on their wedding night. Nothing I write about the scene HERE can convey why my audience laughed so long and so hard at that scene. But they did.

And I also love this line from Matthau's snooty butler to the wealthy Matthau as to why he cannot remain broke: "Sir, you have single-handedly kept traditions alive which were dead before you were born."


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Maybe May should have been given more movies with stricter control. Keep her in-budget a bit, don't give her final edit?

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Different studios seemed to take chances on her as a director only occasionally. She usually came along with a major star attached -- Matthau; Peter Falk (in his Columbo peak); Beatty AND Hoffman for Ishtar. I suppose Neil Simon was the star attached to The Heartbreak Kid. So May had "cover going in" and each and every time (EXCEPT for Heartbreak Kid), she abused her privileges. I should not "bury the lede": evidently everything was fine on Heartbreak Kid. Probably because she didn't have the backing of stars who let her get away with things as Falk, Beatty and Hoffman did.

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I liked her in A Crisis in Six Scenes, too (underrated and fun).

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I am not familiar with this. I'll look it up.

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So she's got a couple good Woody Allen credits.

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I'm familiar with the one called(I think) Small Time Crooks, where she was just as funny as she was in A New Leaf, and just as charismatic.

Honestly, she's ADORABLE in A New Leaf. Massively wealthy through inheritance but a bumbling, waif-like milquetoast with eyeglasses - and a scientific mind for botany. You don't WANT Matthau to kill such a sweet person, and that's why I think the version we got is the correct one. (Why did Paramount greenlight the murder version in the first place anyway?)

Some years ago , Alec Baldwin(can I mention HIM?) spoke of his 30 Rock co-star Tina Fey as "our generation's Elaine May." Kinda correct -- brunette, eyeglasses, attractive enough , a writer performer -- but no, May was off in her own place.

A recent biography of Mike Nichols(recommended) spends a lot of time on Elaine May, too. Nichols and May broke up as a comedy team in the sixties, but remained close comedy partners to the end of Nichols' life. They did "Virginia Woolf" on stage together; she re-wrote "The Birdcage." Etc. Quite a life story together, and evidently, no romance or sex. Maybe.

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Agreed. "Mr. Corcoran won" isn't quite right. Maybe he relented thinking/hoping the marriage would implode, but that can't be what he would consider a victory. Surely he'd have stopped it if he could have. I'm not sure that they stay together at the end, but I don't think divorce is inevitable; it will certainly last long enough for Lenny to annoy his father-in-law with business ventures.

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All agreed. After all, daddy had to walk Cybill down the aisle. The prospects are funny to think about. And though Lenny looks "lost" with those kids at the end, he will likely pick himself up and push on through. We know he has the drive...and now he has a beautiful trophy wife. (BTW, Charles Grodin was a handsome ENOUGH actor in 1972 to make us believe that Cybill Shepard would take his arm in public.)

This being the 70's, Lenny may be en route to four marriages, too. Ya never know.

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Not only do The Graduate and THK both end with weddings, they both have that very similar malaise over the whole thing. They're both incredibly nuanced endings.

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Well, the movies were released in the late 60's/early 70's "time of reckoning" when societies were examining the role of marriage, the role of men, the role of women.

And both movies make this point: it is the male hero's all-encompassing goal to "get to a wedding" -- Hoffman to stop one; Grodin to have one, and BOTH guys overcome an incredible amount of obstacles to obtain their true love.

But both movies find that win to be a rather empty one.

"Marriage" is way too big a topic to cover here (and I'm not the one to do it.) Suffice it to say that I've been to many weddings, been in a number of weddings and...hey, it can cut any number of ways. I have friends who have been married 40 years, I have friends on marriage number four; I have friends who aren't married at all. No blanket statement can be made about the "success" of marriage.

Suffice it to say that in Hays Code Hollywood, romances were meant to lead to marriage, and marriage had to take place before sex, and babies were what sex was meant to be about.

From The Graduate on -- not so much. And remember: in The Graduate, Hoffman rescues Ross AFTER she has taken the vows. She will need an annulment to marry him.

PS. One of my favorite personal stories is from a woman I know who was getting ready to walk down the aisle to marry a man she wasn't sure about. As she took her father's arm, he said to her "You know, you don't have to go through with this. You can call it off right now."

Just like some movies. She went through with it. The divorce was two years later.

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I'm glad we have so many different kinds of comedy. I love when there's a blend of slapstick and deadpan, too. The Party is brilliant.

I miss the group thing, too. Live packed in a full room of other guffawers and chortlers is special. Laughter and music connect people so much, and we're missing that right now.

Simon lost a bit, but had enough in the tank to compete with Allen in '77. The Goodbye Girl bested Annie Hall at the Golden Globes (but not the Oscars). I'm not as familiar with Simon's writing as some others from that time period; what I've seen I've really enjoyed.

May deserves credit for a lot, I'm sure, but I always think directors (in movies) get credit at the expense of the writer. One of the best things of art forms like film is that they are collaborative. Consider the difference between making a film and painting a picture.

The '70s was a great time for mainstream films that felt like indies. The Godfather almost has that "non-studio" vibe. It's a favourite film era of mine. I miss movies that could be for the masses AND the arthouse people. "Arty" films like The Heartbreak Kid have mass-appeal. Major releases like Apocalypse Now didn't make you leave your brain at the door. Modern audiences walk out of something like Sir Gawain and the Green Knight going, "What was that!?" and then they go off to watch X-Men: Apocalypse…

Lila can be irritating, but Lenny married her, and isn't 100% delightful, either. I do agree that, if he's getting out, he should get out five days in rather than 10 years.

Great point about Lenny being Lila to Corcoran and how we're all judged. Corcoran is probably being judged by others, too…

John Cleese made a point that all comedy involves some kind of cruelness, even if only small, even if self-deprecating, but there's always a butt of the joke.

(CONT.)

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M*A*S*H* has cruelty-as-comedy in spades. Hawkeye is funny, but he's cruel (Hotlips). A great example of a combination deadpan-and-pratfalls film. Thinking about deadpan Hawkeye talking to Painless, then the final set piece? War as the cruelest joke of all?

Even the kids aren't happy at the wedding, listening to Lenny drone on and on in platitudes and empty cliches.

The father is certainly a big part of the movie, and those are some of the best scenes, but for my money it's Lenny's movie and everybody else is serving that story.

Berlin did get a nod from the Academy, too, yes. She was nominated for a Golden Globe, too, as was Grodin (but not Eddie…)

Lenny's likeable insofar as we root for the underdog; his tenacity is endearing and funny. We've all struggled through making life-mistakes and existential quandaries. He's also unsympathetic because of his treatment of Lila and his vapid aimlessness in life; he's his own worst enemy. I liked the film partly because I spend it hoping Lenny will finally get it together, then laughing, crying, and shaking my head when he doesn't.

Your insights are bang-on about his accomplishing things like a hero, but not quite being heroic. I think it's the way he goes about things, his reasons for doing them, that prevent him from being a hero. He's selfishly motivated, and not even in a self-actualizing way, it's almost all id. He's a short-term thinker.

Lenny's military boast is also hilarious. "Unfortunately, not overseas because of a minor back problem…" Grodin's delivery is, again, impeccable. And, yeah, him talking with the kids is funny, too. Then heartbreaking: "I was ten." Gutpunch.

Yes casting Berlin was given a role where she could be her best; definitely a good call. One of the best ways to be a good (or great) director is to cast well.

I've only seen the remake's trailer, but yes, Malin Akerman is a hottie with horrible habits or something. Twice as broad, half as effective. I think Ben Stiller is also a little better looking and broader than Grodin, too. I liked that Lenny and Lila were both just "average". It makes his obsession with Kelly more understandable, too; he's out of his depth. But he's going for it, anyway. That's what makes him endearing, tragic, and funny.

A better man would have made that first marriage work, but more importantly, a better man would have known this wasn't "the one" and been more sensible from the start.

I'm glad we have A New Leaf as-is, too.

Crisis in Six Scenes is on Amazon. It was Woody's attempt at a TV series. It's a mixed-bag, but Allen and May are funny and charming (Allen in particular), and it's got some great laugh-out-loud farce-type moments.

May is one of the only "inept rom-com heroines" where the inept aspect works. How many rom-com leading ladies trip and bump into things? A lot. But May made it work.

It's interesting to think about what happens next with HBK and Lenny. He does have the drive. And maybe with a powerful father-in-law and a socialite wife he might have the support he needs to go somewhere. He might not have direction, but maybe Kelly and Corcoran will force him into a path and he'll find his way somewhere in their pushing? Anything's possible.

I kinda like the idea of him having an affair with Lila in ten-fifteen years. Doesn't that sound vintage Lenny?

Marriage is a huge topic. I'm glad we have movies that care enough to tackle romance and love and attraction in a mature, nuanced way (even though The Graduate and HBK don't really get into marriage itself, just getting there - or not).

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acespade wrote:

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I'm glad we have so many different kinds of comedy.

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Yep. As a kid, I think I went for slapstick more, but as I grew older, the one-liners of Woody Allen, Animal House and Caddyshack took the honors, too.

I always felt that Mel Brooks' career was shorter than people think, and had different collaborators who sometimes made his movies funnier than Brooks could alone. To wit:

The Producers: That's all Mel Brooks' baby. He won an Oscar for the script.
Blazing Saddles: Richard Pryor's "voice" can be heard in a lot of the material. This is Brooks most R-rated movie.
Young Frankenstein: Definitely hear Gene Wilder's voice here. Wilder went off to make a lot of "Young Frankenstein" like movies, but without Brooks, they lacked something.

After these peaks. Brooks rather struggled(without Pryor, without Wilder, who teamed up together) through High Anxiety, History of the World, Spaceballs...he kind of faded out.

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I love when there's a blend of slapstick and deadpan, too. The Party is brilliant.

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Its pretty much a "silent movie" circa 1968, but the continual banal Hollywood party talk is funny as a "background hum" to the slapstick action which...of course...grows and grows and grows as Sellers screws more and more things up.

But Steve Franken's drunken waiter steals a scene all by himself in the background through a swinging door.

Given my age, I will carry forever a great memory of seeing the movie first run in 1968, with my parental family and siblings. I don't think we ever laughed so hard -- as a FAMILY -- at a movie before or after. And when you're young(as I was) you laugh even HARDER. I couldn't breathe. "The Party" doesn't work for me that good NOW, but the memories are there.

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I miss the group thing, too. Live packed in a full room of other guffawers and chortlers is special. Laughter and music connect people so much, and we're missing that right now.

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Yes. I "can't fight progress," and a major movie exec named Bob Iger(Disney) said this very week that he thinks movie theaters will never come all the way back -- folks will stay home to watch, only "BIG" movies will go to theaters.

But there is something to be said for a crowd and all that laughter (or all that SCREAMING, but people stopped doing that in recent years, they got "un-scarable.")

Rock concerts are their own thing. My age has had me cutting back, but I went to a Jimmy Buffett concert recently (postponed for a year from COVID) and -- felt right at home with all the "age peers" around me, many with grayer hair than mine. As Jimmy said, "I'm growing older, but not up."


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(Neil) Simon lost a bit, but had enough in the tank to compete with Allen in '77. The Goodbye Girl bested Annie Hall at the Golden Globes (but not the Oscars). I'm not as familiar with Simon's writing as some others from that time period; what I've seen I've really enjoyed

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There can be no doubt that Neil Simon was a "comedy force" in his time, and The Odd Couple is another movie I recall seeing with a crowd that got BIG laughs -- like when Lemmon made those weird sounds to clear his nose in a public restaurant and Matthau just deadpanned horror at it.

A producer named Ray Stark made sure to keep Neil Simon front and center for many years. The Goodbye Girl was a "surprise hit." I thought Simon's wife, Marsha Mason, was terrible in it, and didn[t particularly look good but -- I guess women liked her. Richard Dreyfuss carried it and got that Oscar -- kind of deserved, kind of not(I felt the Hand of Ray Stark guiding older Oscar voters.)

A year later, an all star cast was summoned to play four stories in "California Suite" so -- Simon stayed a power.

I think Neil Simon finally petered out in the 80s, though an attempted comeback with The Marrying Man in the 90's brought him up against...Alec Baldwin? Tempermental star. Not a good pairing...

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May deserves credit for a lot, I'm sure, but I always think directors (in movies) get credit at the expense of the writer.

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A lot of screenwriters felt that way. I'm split on the subject.

A screenwriter named Ernest Lehman wrote North by Northwest for Hitchcock; the script was Oscar nommed.

Lehman claimed that the movie was as much HIS work as Hitchcock's.

Maybe so, but 4 years later Lehman wrote a "North by Northwest" clone called The Prize and it wasn't nearly as good as North by Northwest. Too many bad jokes(Hitch would have cut them) not enough structure.

So sometimes, the director DOES matter.

There is something about The Heartbreak Kid -- perhaps its non-stage bound, many locations (sunny Florida, snowy Minnesota) that gives it a an indie film look that feel more "May than Simon" and allows the comedy to feel more "hip."

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One of the best things of art forms like film is that they are collaborative. Consider the difference between making a film and painting a picture.

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Yep. I'll use Hitchcock again. Psycho had Hitch as director; Bernard Herrmann's INTENSE score, Saul Bass's state of the art credit sequence, a hip young screenwriter in Joe Stefano, and interesting actors including a young Anthony Perkins and a New York Method Man(Martin Balsam)...along with Janet Leigh from the Late Golden Age.

The comedy of Woody Allen is "one voice," but Mel Brooks used TEAMS.

Animal House had a well-honed script from Harvard grads and comedy specialists, directed by John Landis with some real "comedy timing" chops. Belushi for the slapstick; Tim Matheson(surprisingly) for the one-liners.
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The '70s was a great time for mainstream films that felt like indies.

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That's what a lot of it was all about. We know the history now -- and you could SEE it. The studios were pretty much falling apart, almost out of business. When they made "studio movies" in the 70's -- like Airport or Earthquake or Westworld -- they looked CLUNKY.

But the New Hollywood guys -- inspired by European films in the main -- brought that semi-documentary grit(on the one hand) and a certain European elegance on the other. Both The Godfather and Chinatown are very good looking movies with high "craft"; but they have "indie" sensibilities.

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The Godfather almost has that "non-studio" vibe.

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I think some critic noted that, even if you took the R material out, The Godfather simply would not have looked the same or been cast the same or written the same as a 1962 studio film.

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It's a favourite film era of mine.

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Yep, the 70's were great. Almost a "mistake era" -- corporate people came to Hollywood by 1980 and cleaned out most of those directors and producers. It was a fluke. Frankly , there were a lot of arty flops to go alongside the blockbusters.

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I miss movies that could be for the masses AND the arthouse people.

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That's my wheelhouse. The Godfather, The Exorcist, Chinatown....(earlier) Psycho...I think they fit both categories.

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"Arty" films like The Heartbreak Kid have mass-appeal.

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A movie like this was a delicate balance even in the 70's. The look and feel of the movie were "art," as was the overall storyline: Lenny was a CAD..he would have been a VILLAIN in a 1940s film. This movie looked at him with a cold, knowing eye...and a big laugh.

---

Major releases like Apocalypse Now didn't make you leave your brain at the door. Modern audiences walk out of something like Sir Gawain and the Green Knight going, "What was that!?" and then they go off to watch X-Men: Apocalypse…

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Things change.

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Lila can be irritating, but Lenny married her, and isn't 100% delightful, either.

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The movie is tough minded about that. I don't know who "the perfect people are," but Hollywood in the 70's was looking a lot at jerks. They were WRITTEN as jerks.

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I do agree that, if he's getting out, he should get out five days in rather than 10 years.

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Internet articles often seem to "make fun" of celebrity marriages than only last a few weeks(example: Jon Peters and Pamela Anderson.) But those folks are actually pretty smart. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work.

On the other hand, there is something to be said for commitment, through thick and thin, etc.

And I have always admired the "content and loving couples" I've met in my lifetime. It WORKS from them. True love. No jealousy. No "greener grass." I'm in admiration.

---

Great point about Lenny being Lila to Corcoran and how we're all judged. Corcoran is probably being judged by others, too…

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We're ALL being judged . (Sometimes right on these boards.) Life is filled with challenges from the inside and the outside.

That's true about Mr. Corcoran. He IS being judged by his Minnesota wealth peers -- it can't be easy knowing that he is going to have to inflict Lenny on them. .

--
John Cleese made a point that all comedy involves some kind of cruelness, even if only small, even if self-deprecating, but there's always a butt of the joke.

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I think so. We are "safely on the outside' watching the cruelty and laughing about it. I'm flashing back to an Aaron Sorkin-written scene in "Charlie Wilson's War" where CIA agents Philip Seymour Hoffman and John Slattery have a VERY funny VERY angry argument shouting match that is hilarious to watch. In real life, one of the men would likely be fired and/or they would never speak to each other again. On the screen...its nothing but hilarious fun. A "fantasy fulfillment": yelling at the boss.

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M*A*S*H* has cruelty-as-comedy in spades.

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MASH the movie was a "lead in" to Animal House a mere 8 years later (Donald Sutherland is in both) but MASH is SO MUCH meaner in tone...driven, of course, by extremely bloody scenes of a combat hospital and the life/death savagery that rises up there.

I've read so many "modern" posts on MASH that find the movie unconscionably mean. But I guess you had to be there -- Korea is standing in for Viet Nam, and today's vicious political debate was then more "blood soaked" with a war raging and a draft on.

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Hawkeye is funny, but he's cruel (Hotlips).

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The film's "treatment of women" looks pretty bad, but it was a sex comedy from a man's viewpoint. Hot Lips goes from bureaucratic foe to "dumb girlfriend" and...well, it amazed amazed me THEN. I suppose the point was women will "give in" to dominating men. And Hot Lips was as interested in sex with the "bad guy" as the "good guy" later. Kind of a "Playboy movie," I guess.

I"ve always thought this: "MASH" was a "liberal"(progressive) film, made by progressive people and yet it goes so far against feminism that we are reminded: liberal guys could be just as sexist as conservative guys. The politics just sort of goes away in the face of "the battle of the sexes."

---A great example of a combination deadpan-and-pratfalls film. Thinking about deadpan Hawkeye talking to Painless, then the final set piece?

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Yep. One-liners and a slapstick football game (with one of the first uses of the F-word.)

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War as the cruelest joke of all?

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Yep.

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Back to The Heartbreak Kid

acespade wrote:

Even the kids aren't happy at the wedding, listening to Lenny drone on and on in platitudes and empty cliches.

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A great joke: Lenny cant talk to them as KIDS. He's still stuck in his spiels. Plus, evidently all the adults(including Cybill!) are ignoring him.

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The father is certainly a big part of the movie, and those are some of the best scenes, but for my money it's Lenny's movie and everybody else is serving that story.

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Agreed, sort of. Lenny has comedy scenes with Lila and with Cybill but...I think the Eddie Albert scenes were the best in terms of "mano y mano" confrontation.

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Berlin did get a nod from the Academy, too, yes. She was nominated for a Golden Globe, too, as was Grodin (but not Eddie…)

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I checked those Golden Globe noms. Intersting in the Best Supporting Actor category: whereas the Oscars put Pacino, Caan, and Duvall together from the Godfather there, the GGs moved Pacino up to Best Actor against Brando and dropped Duvall entirely. But Albert was dropped and James Coco(Man of La Mancha) and Alec McCowen(Travels with My Aunt) got IN. Quite a split that year with Oscar. And yet we have to always remind ourselves: the GGs are voted by NOBODIES. (Well, they are somebodies somewhere and to the people who know them, but they don't really have "technical industry jobs" like the Oscar voters. They are like me, a nobody in Hollywood. But "everybody's second business is the movies." )

Which is too bad, because I see that the GGs gave Hitchcock and Frenzy four noms that same year; the Academy gave Frenzy 0.

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Lenny's likeable insofar as we root for the underdog; his tenacity is endearing and funny.

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Yes, that's true. This is one of those good movies where we see Lenny "both ways." There is a heroism in his persistance, and how he drives away the football hunks who guard Cybill(with brains, not brawn.) And the fight to win one's true love is classic -- just usually not shown after dumping another woman.

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We've all struggled through making life-mistakes and existential quandaries.

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All too many. The movies help us mirror our real life trials with fictional outcomes, I suppose.

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He's also unsympathetic because of his treatment of Lila and his vapid aimlessness in life; he's his own worst enemy. I liked the film partly because I spend it hoping Lenny will finally get it together, then laughing, crying, and shaking my head when he doesn't.

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Well, the more he goes on, the phonier he becomes. Eddie Albert is RIGHT; Lenny's dinner table conversation is as phony as can be. (On the other hand, I myself have had to talk in public and found my struggles to improvise can head to phony land; we cannot all be great speakers, its embarrassing when you realize you are embarrassing yourself.)

And he's still being a phony at the wedding. With the kids. With the Corcorans ignoring him.

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Lenny's military boast is also hilarious. "Unfortunately, not overseas because of a minor back problem…" Grodin's delivery is, again, impeccable.

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A big laugh and -- perhaps Neil Simon? (sounds like him.)

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And, yeah, him talking with the kids is funny, too. Then heartbreaking: "I was ten." Gutpunch.

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The Heartbreak Kid is comedy with a gutpunch. Good way of putting it.

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Yes casting Berlin was given a role where she could be her best; definitely a good call. One of the best ways to be a good (or great) director is to cast well.

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Yes, "casting well" has been offered by a variety of directors as key to a great movie(though I'd say a great script has to be there first.)

Stanley Kubrick opined that he felt The Godfather was the best cast movie he'd ever seen. A fair point.

What's amazing with The Heartbreak Kid is that May went for nepotism(her own daughter) but KNEW her daughter was right for the role. Unlike Sofia Coppola in Godfather III.



---I've only seen the remake's trailer, but yes, Malin Akerman is a hottie with horrible habits or something. Twice as broad, half as effective. I think Ben Stiller is also a little better looking and broader than Grodin, too. I liked that Lenny and Lila were both just "average".

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The reviews were so bad that I just can't bring myself to watch the remake. I'm not much of a Ben Stiller fan, either -- and I can't seem him matching Grodin's deadpan at all.

IS there a father in the remake?

As with many great(or even really good) movies, The Heartbreak Kid is OF its era, its year --its a 70's story. Doing it all plastic and colorful and flashy in the 2000s doesn't fit.

--- It makes his obsession with Kelly more understandable, too; he's out of his depth. But he's going for it, anyway.

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Well, that's a Hollywood fantasy too, right? For "not that great looking guys." We(?) CAN get the hottie if we try.

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That's what makes him endearing, tragic, and funny.

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Yes, we stick it out with him. And WE were willing to leave Lila behind, too. She's out of our minds.

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A better man would have made that first marriage work, but more importantly, a better man would have known this wasn't "the one" and been more sensible from the start.

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For those of us with "a few" relationships in our lives, we have hopefully grown over time. Don't marry the wrong personfor you!

And I'm definitely on the side of living together before deciding to marry....

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I'm glad we have A New Leaf as-is, too.

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Me, too. I wonder what the REAL deal was with Paramount on that. Did they approve the "murder script" but retained the right to edit the murders out? May's character is just too NICE to kill, and even if she survived and other murders happened...not good for the love story at its heart.

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Crisis in Six Scenes is on Amazon. It was Woody's attempt at a TV series. It's a mixed-bag, but Allen and May are funny and charming (Allen in particular), and it's got some great laugh-out-loud farce-type moments.

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I'll go track that down. Its funny about Elaine May: her movie director career crashed and burned, but she has always WORKED. Her partner Mike Nichols has passed, but she carries on. (Or she DID carry on..perhaps retired now.)

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May is one of the only "inept rom-com heroines" where the inept aspect works. How many rom-com leading ladies trip and bump into things? A lot. But May made it work.

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Her "New Leaf" performance is one for the ages; you'd think she coulda been a BIG stand alone 70's star, but she didn't want it.

May returned to team with Matthau in Neil Simon's California Suite(1978). Its a ten minute trifle, but she's good as Matthau's wife (as he struggles with an unconscious hooker he didn't want while trying to keep May at bay in the other room.)


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I kinda like the idea of him having an affair with Lila in ten-fifteen years. Doesn't that sound vintage Lenny?

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Ha. Especially if Lila "ages well," stays sexy(she was) and becomes successful.

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Marriage is a huge topic. I'm glad we have movies that care enough to tackle romance and love and attraction in a mature, nuanced way (even though The Graduate and HBK don't really get into marriage itself, just getting there - or not).

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Well, love stories have always been with us, and we like them...let's face it, most of us will NOT be firing machine guns and swinging from ropes, but we WILL be falling in love, contemplating marriage, breaking up...its the human condition and the movies can do whatever they want with it...and we will RESPOND.

There's a movie out right now in 2022(from 2021) that I like called "Licorice Pizza" and at it art film heart...its about love. And its involving because that's what its about.

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Feet to the fire, yeah, I'll go for wordplay over slapstick, but I appreciate slapstick more now than as a kid. Chaplin wasn't just giving us some good laughs, he was able to put over this genuine human being with depth and resonance - all through his body. I'm less likely now to go for The Three Stooges, but it's not about method; it's purpose. Chaplin and Allen have real purpose behind their comedy. It's not just that they're getting slapped or saying a quippy one-liner, it's why.

Your assessment of Brooks is a bullseye. Although I really like History of the World Part I. It's underrated.

The waiter in The Party is brilliant! Traipsing through the water feature is classic. But you know, the first thing I think of about that film is the satirical commentary on all these people dismissing this guy who's the nicest guy at the party, and Bakshi is a great guy. It's the sweet moments I loved the most.

Plus, who doesn't love a '60s film that ends with a giant bubble scene?

I think I laugh a little less these days, too. I wonder if that happens to everybody?

Theatres will come back. Some will close, others will open. There will always be a call for seeing classics and arthouse films on the big screen. It's like records. Turntables are still big for audiophiles. Cinephiles will keep the movie houses open. Unfortunately, most theatres - especially in smaller towns - will probably just be running constant MCU crap. Frankly, though, I think the last cinemas will be arthouses. Disney et al. are pushing for the at-home thing. I think they'd rather just have Disney+. But we who love movies will always want to watch Casablanca on the big screen one more time.

Directors deserve a tonne of credit, too. I just see them getting all the credit, and people forget film is collaborative. Editors have it even worse than writers. I've heard it said that films are made three times: written, shot, edited. John Q. Public tends only to credit the guy responsible for the middle bit. I know the director guides scripts (and edits), but I still think writers and editors get shafted for glory.

I also think it's not nice how easily producers, directors, and others can just callously alter the writer's scripts. I think that sucks.

You're right, though: directors have a major part played, too.

I think Woody's films have more of that one voice feel because he gets involved at all levels. He picks music, sets up shots, is in the editing room. He he's always guiding. I think this is why people think his films are all "the same", even though Crimes & Misdemeanors doesn't feel like Annie Hall at all.

Ultimately Woody oversees, but he's famous for having a light touch. I think that's why there are so many good performances in his films. He relies on his cast and crew, even if he's all over the movie.

I attribut that '70s goodness to the European thing, too. Directors like Scorsese grew up on foreign cinema and brought that true Art thing to Hollywood.

I love Star Wars, but I kinda blame it for the end of that era. Star Wars gave the studios a clear direction: toys. That's when you can hear the little, cash-register CA-CHING gears turning in their little, executive heads.

Every era of movies has its greatness (and its dreck), so I don't want to start going, "Oh, the '70s were the last of the great movie eras!" but there was something special there, and it definitely died (as opposed to just phasing into different sensibilities).

Chinatown, yes. I think I could watch that movie on a loop and it'd take me three days to get bored.

Jerks-as-heroes.. Movies have always had jerks, but the interesting thing is when they're the hero. I love a good, classic hero archetype, too, but there's something so, so fun about jerks. Larry David on Curb Your Enthusiasm? Don Draper? Jerks give great story possibilities.

There is a wisdom to knowing when to fold 'em (that's Kenny, not Lenny). But it's bad to dissolve the marriage after 5 days; I'm not letting Lenny off the hook. It's not because it's bad to cut his losses - that's good. The mistake is barreling in with so little regard for one's partner or oneself that the marriage is doomed before it starts. The callous attitude Lenny (or Hollywood celebs) have towards romance and marriage is what I find deplorable, mockable - not knowing when it's time to get out.

Commitment is good. That's the other reason we cock our eyebrows at people pulling the parachute that quickly into a marriage: they clearly aren't trying at all. See a counsellor. Put in a little effort.

funny (in spite of himself) is how much effort he's willing to put in to the dumb decision. If he worked half as hard at his marriage (and finding a good partner to begin with) as he did at leaving her, he'd have been happy.

I feel like we've dissected M*A*S*H*, Animal House, and other "frat bro" movies before… I seem to recall a very, very in-depth conversation on the subject.

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M*A*S*H* is mean, but not unconscionably so. I'm with you: it's about war. You think Hawkeye's mean? Try the Viet Kong. Try invading a country. And, of course, that's the whole point, are these people responding to the nihilistic realities around them. He's mean, and the paradox is that he's funny.

I did think Hotlips' transition to the cheerleading bimbo was done rather quickly. Maybe a flaw in that gem.

Liberal guys are just as sexist as conservative ones: yes. Jerks are everywhere.

Lenny gets his biggest pushback from Corcoran, yes. So they are the most adversarial. I'll agree with that.

The Godfather hopping Pacino to Best Supporting was a bit of bet-hedging shenanigans because they didn't want him competing with Brando. They should've been reversed; Pacino's clearly the lead.

"The movies help us mirror our real life trials…"

"…to hold, as 't were, the mirror up to nature…" Yes. That's what I was trying to get at up there with the comedy stuff: the best comedy shows us something of ourselves and life, whether slapstick or repartee.

I think we're in total agreement on The Heartbreak Kid.

I've got no problem with giving a family member a role; it's only nepotism when the family member didn't deserve it. Berlin 100% did.

I don't think there's a father in the remake. I'm just going off the trailer. That whole plotline wouldn’t work as well these days, anyway. I saw a production of The Importance of Being Earnest once, and the bums had set it in the modern era. Suddenly Cecily needing Jack's permission to wed, because she's his "ward", doesn't make a lick of sense. A large thread of the plot just unravelled from sweater back to skein.

It's a good fantasy. Us averages can get perfect 10s…

Yeah, it might be the case that the studio approved of A New Leaf always intending to wipe out that final murder…

I don't know if May is retired now. A Crisis in Six Scenes was the last thing I've seen her in. That was six years ago or thereabouts. Maybe seven.

I'll probably see if I can track down that bit from California Suite. Sounds like a ten minute hoot.

Lila "aging well" would be hilarious.

I'm meaning to check out Licorice Pizza, too. I have yet to see a Paul Thomas Anderson movie that didn't deliver the goods.

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Feet to the fire, yeah, I'll go for wordplay over slapstick, but I appreciate slapstick more now than as a kid.

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That's interesting. I suppose one(I) shouldn't consign slapstick to "childhood laughs."

I do know that as hard as I laughed at The Party as a kid..."something happened internally" where the guffaws just didn't return decades later.

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Chaplin wasn't just giving us some good laughs, he was able to put over this genuine human being with depth and resonance - all through his body.

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True confession: I'm not all that "into" Chaplin and Keaton. Its a double-edged sword. Critics of 1963 found "Its a Mad Mad World" to be nothing much compared to the classics of Charlie and Buster, and objectively, I'm inclined to agree. I KNOW my classics.

Still, Jonathan Winters' slapstick destruction of that gas station AND his one liners in Mad World are just more connected to my life and my growing up and my peers. I ACKNOWLEDGE Chaplin as more important in film history...but he's "back there," and of course, invested in a very real pathos and heartbreak ethos, too.

I liked Keaton a bit more. All that deadpan. All that ACTION (The General ,and the "hundreds of brides" chase in Seven Chances -- which became an unfunny modern movie just a decade or two ago.)

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I'm less likely now to go for The Three Stooges, but it's not about method; it's purpose. Chaplin and Allen have real purpose behind their comedy. It's not just that they're getting slapped or saying a quippy one-liner, it's why.

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Very well put.

The Stooges became a "thing" in my high school years -- watching the shorts with other guys, making fun OF them as we laughed WITH them.
A bit in college, too -- a shared laugh among students from all over the country, when one would be shown BEFORE a student showing of The Longest Yard or some such.

Watching The Three Stooges today, I sense a "lower class thing" to them...like they were kinda "down and dirty and from the streets" in an era of more elegant comedy. And that was in their FAVOR. A bit like a Troma film, or porno(without the porno, just the bad production values.)

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The waiter in The Party is brilliant!

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THAT scene (with the door opening and closing, opening and closing, on the two waiters in conflict) is where I truly almost died laughing. Steve Franken as the drunk waiter, Blake Edwards regular James Lanphier as the "mean" other waiter.

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Traipsing through the water feature is classic. But you know, the first thing I think of about that film is the satirical commentary on all these people dismissing this guy who's the nicest guy at the party, and Bakshi is a great guy. It's the sweet moments I loved the most.

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Yes, there's a weird vibe to the piece. Sellers -- doing a SWEET Hindu accent (dialect humor is now OUT) nonetheless wrecks the movie set in the prologue, and wrecks the party thereafter. But its just the way he is.

I do like how the Cowboy Star(kind of Clint Eastwood before Clint was Clint) is the one guy who likes "the little buddy." And Sellers is liked by the prettiest girl there, of course (Claudine Longet, so sweet herself -- eventually to survive a manslaughter charge for shooting a boyfriend in real life.)

BTW, The Party shows us that the whole '"me too" thing was there in 1968, with any number of powerful middle-aged and unattractive moguls lording over pretty women. It was ever thus. Gavin McLeod captures the type perfectly here.

Of course, some women gladly accepted...

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Plus, who doesn't love a '60s film that ends with a giant bubble scene?

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With Mancini rock and roll! And a baby elephant!
(The kid I was liked that, like Disney or Hatari).

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I think I laugh a little less these days, too. I wonder if that happens to everybody?

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I dunno. People don't scream at violence in movies anymore much either. I guess we got jaded. Too cool. Perhaps too knowledgeable about the real traumas of life.

Also...do we really HAVE a lot of filmic comedy "names" anymore? After Judd Apataow, who? And is he that great?(Like a lot of today's comic writer-directors, he sure doesn't like a lot of people "on the other side." We have a lot of very rich, very powerful, and very ANGRY comedy filmmakers these days.

Back in the days: Jerry Lewis, Dean Martin(separately), Billy Wilder, Jack Lemmon, Neil Simon, Bill Cosby(yep), Walter Matthau, Mel Brooks, Woody Allen, Richard Pryor, Steve Martin, Chevy Chase, John Belushi, Gilda Radner, Dan Ackroyd, Bill Murray, Eddie Murphy...Adam Sandler? Will Ferrell?

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Your assessment of Brooks is a bullseye. Although I really like History of the World Part I. It's underrated.

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Thanks.

Its a matter of some study with me. For a year or two(but only that) in the 70's "Mel Brooks and Woody Allen" were IT for comedy. It would seem that the whole SNL/National Lampoon squad knocked them both out -- suddenly we had a LOT of new "young" talent out there.

Mel Brooks hit big with the gritty indie NYC movie "The Producers," struggled for a few years (The Twelve Chairs wasn't much of a hit) and then hit BIG -- in ONE YEAR -- with two major studio movies: Blazing Saddles and Young Frankenstein.

The descent was rather sudden and steep -- Silent Movie(with some BIG movie star cameos) was too much of a "Dom DeLuise joint", High Anxiety didn't work (Brooks couldn't do Hitchcock justice)...it just rather fell apart. I attribute it to Mel Brooks losing those writing collaborators. Alone, he was kinda silly.

History of the World WAS funny and does have fans. But it was like the 80's wanted nothing to do with Mel. The summer of 1980 had had Airplane, The Blues Brothers, Caddyshack and a sleeper I love called "Used Cars" -- Mel Brooks just seemed as passe as the Borscht Belt.

..and Woody went and got serious(in the main.)

(More later. Ran out of time to respond.)

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Theatres will come back. Some will close, others will open. There will always be a call for seeing classics and arthouse films on the big screen.

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Oh, I agree.

Us amateur film historians know that "the movies" were supposed to die many times:

When b/w TV came in in the 50s. (Solution: big color movies.)

When color TV came in in the 60's. (Solution: R rated movies.)

When the studios started closing down in the 60's. (Pauline Kael predicted no more movies, just TV.)

And so forth and so on.

COVID brought down quite a death blow, but only for a year or so. I personally(as an older person) have been to the movies about 10 tens in the last two years.

We're waiting for more movies to get cleared for release. Then the theaters will do even better.

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It's like records. Turntables are still big for audiophiles. Cinephiles will keep the movie houses open. Unfortunately, most theatres - especially in smaller towns - will probably just be running constant MCU crap. Frankly, though, I think the last cinemas will be arthouses. Disney et al. are pushing for the at-home thing. I think they'd rather just have Disney+. But we who love movies will always want to watch Casablanca on the big screen one more time.

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All agreed. There was a temporary cut back, but in the US, there are at least three "movie series" programs cycling " a classic a month" through modern multiplex screens. I've seen Psycho and MASH and Jaws and North by Northwest and Butch Cassidy and To Catch a Thief(THAT one got a full house; the glamour, I guess), and Monty Python and the Holy Grail...etc ect. Casablanca , too.

Plus you got your Big Lebowski (newer but "old") out there in rotation on the big screen, too.

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Directors deserve a tonne of credit, too. I just see them getting all the credit, and people forget film is collaborative. Editors have it even worse than writers. I've heard it said that films are made three times: written, shot, edited. John Q. Public tends only to credit the guy responsible for the middle bit. I know the director guides scripts (and edits), but I still think writers and editors get shafted for glory.

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Well, that's a leftover , I think, from two eras. Golden Age -- Ford, Hitchcock, Hawks were SOLD as stars(and Hitch with his TV show was the biggest of them all.)

Then, in the early 70's, a new breed of "film school critics" worked on overtime to promote "an auteur a week" -- some lasted (Scorsese, Spielberg, DePalma) some did not(Bogdonovich, Freidkin...even Coppola and Altman I'd say, and Peckinpah fell from grace and died young.)

Modernly, our auteurs often prove themselves such as "writer-directors" -- QT, PTA, and recently Aaron Sorkin(upgrading from just writing to directing.)

Film editors? Well, Verna Fields supposedly really "made" Jaws from Spielberg's mess of footage(but HIS POV is always there) and it is believed that QT's movies lost some tightness and edge when his editor Sally Menke died young.

So we CAN find these credits.

Still, I use my story of Ernest Lehman (NBNW -- great; The Prize -- lousy) to remind us all that a truly GREAT director is a "boss" -- cuts bad lines, perfects good performances, supervises the overall project...

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I also think it's not nice how easily producers, directors, and others can just callously alter the writer's scripts. I think that sucks.

You're right, though: directors have a major part played, too.

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I tried saying wordplay is sophisticated and slapstick is fun, and every time I did, I'd recall something physical, funny, and moving, and I changed my position.

Chaplin's just an example. I'm sure there's somebody that you resonate with more, even if that's not a movie. Maybe you've seen a physical clown performer live or something.

My confession is that I haven't seen a tonne of Keaton. I'll also confess that, although it's on my List, I haven't seen It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World. I'm a huge fan of Jonathan Winters, though. Just because something's more important to "film history" doesn't mean it's better. Sometimes obscure stuff is better than what's remembered. I think I'm one of the only people on this planet who will remember the novel Puckoon by Spike Milligan. But darned if that book didn't make me laugh so hard I nearly peed.

I respect the Stooges. They're great at doing their thing, but they weren't going for "deep".

Sellers and he did a great job with Bakshi.

One thing I never understood with the #metoo stuff was the "How could this be happening!?" sentiment. Casting couch jokes for decades, and nobody figured out that Hollywood execs were abusing their power to engage in sexual abuse? Come on.

It's weird to think that our entire culture might be jaded. Can that be true? We scream less, but every Pixar film that comes out, seems like there's somebody crying at how moving it was. I wonder if it's just with how much media we consume. Time once was, theatres were it for entertainment. Then radio, TV, cable. VCRs and DVDs let us watch our favourites ad-nauseum. Now we've got instant access to whatever we want in HD and content pours from youtube and the rest. Maybe we're just deadened to it all.

That's another reason I miss live arts. It's less passive, more powerful, and there's something so magical about knowing, "This is it; this happens tonight and never again."

Big name comedy? Yeah, you're right. Not so much anymore. We have a lot of action-comedy hybrid stars - another bi-product of the MCU's formula. We don't have Jack Lemmon, we get Robert Downey Jr. or The Rock. That kind of thing.

I did a quick search for best comedies of the 2010s, 2000s, and 1990s. The results were very interesting, and require a LOT more analysis than I can sum up here. I noticed that there were indie films across the board (low-budget works with puns, I guess), and there were action-comedy hybrids in all three as well. But in the 90s, there were a LOT more "big" comedy movies, heavily promoted. There also seemed to be a lot more iconic films, like The Cable Guy and The Big Lebowski. 2020s lists didn't have as much agreement, either, like critics and list-voters can't figure out what the big comedy films of the last decade even were.

Comedy is in the cracks. Because of the "we're offended" crowd, a bit; I've read articles about how China is a huge movie market and comedy doesn't translate. The other important thing is proximity: maybe it's just that we don't remember what the brilliant films of a decade truly were until time passes. I think it's a hybrid of factors.

I can't think of any actors who are mostly known for laughs. A lot of the comedy guys are getting out. Todd Phillips talked about that in a Joker interview. I do think we have a lot of comedians, though. And they've got BOLD work coming out. Dave Chappelle is maybe the biggest. That dude swings for the fences. I know he's kinda from a past era, but he's still doing exciting work. Other comedians on Netflix do impressive stuff - Bo Burnham, for instance. That's where a lot of the funny is these days: as I said, in the cracks.


In some ways, I think this is almost where Comedy belongs. It's subversive. It's punk rock with a bulbous, red nose.

There's a great Mel Brooks/Woody Allen debate on Siskel and Ebert show. They represent the two branches of comedy we've been talking about, the "basic" yuks (Brooks) and the stuff that seeks depth with its laughs (Allen).

I'm looking up Used Cars on your recommendation; you've got good taste.

Woody did get serious, but still knows how to do comedy. To Rome with Love, man… Woody's reaction to shaking the funeral parlour guy's hand had me in stitches. People say Woody's lost it, but I think that's just what people say. I still love his stuff. Magic in the Moonlight is funny and sweet. Midnight in Paris is wonderfully inventive. Wonder Wheel and Irrational Man get me thinking again and again. I can't tell you how stupid I think Amazon are for trying to put a lid on his recent works. And I think every, single employee of Hachette that threatened to quit over Woody's memoires should've been taken up on their kind offer.

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It's funny which classic films sell out the house, isn't it? Sometimes I go to classic film screenings and it's almost empty, and I'm a little sad because people aren't interested in this brilliant movie, but I also like that I kinda feel like I'm in on a secret.

The auteur director as god also feeds into our psyches' need for simplicity. It's too much information to go, "Who made this brilliant film?" and hear a list of thirty names. If you can just go, "Steven Spielberg," it's easier.

I've watched a few videos about Marcia Lucas and her editing team on Star Wars making that picture work. I think that's probably true a LOT. The editors make the movie work. Not to diminish the director, but the way films are made means, intrinsically, that editors will be key players.

Sally Menke's early death explains a lot, actually. Django Unchained was the first movie of QT's that I watched and thought, "I think he's at his most self-indulgent here." So, maybe it was Menke all along… I still love Django and Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood, but those films are cut differently.

The key is that all cast and crew on a film have a job and they have to do it extremely well. And, yes, to give directors their due, they are the boss and everything gets filtered through their lens (literally and figuratively), so ultimately that credit does lie with them. I just like to try and remember the writers and editors and others.

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I think Woody's films have more of that one voice feel because he gets involved at all levels. He picks music, sets up shots, is in the editing room. He he's always guiding.

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Very much so. I think critics tend to forget to include Woody Allen among the "70's auteurs" who also included Scorsese and Spielberg(and for awhile Bogdanovich and Friedkin.)

The reason: in the 70's in particular, Woody Allen was a very big MOVIE STAR. He was THE comedy template for a generation(starting in the 60's, when he did TV in the main.) That voice. That manner. That nebbish appeal -- and, I think, oddly enough, his ability to project a certain virility AND even a bit of rebel macho.

After being in some expensive 60's movies like What's New Pussycat and Casino Royale, in the 70's (and starting with 1969's Take the Money and Run) Woody was really making low budget indiefilms. He sold them as "straight comedies," (and usually as absurdist ones) but got more and more serious as time went on.

I've always been intrigued by how Bananas and Sleeper had the same political plot and same political message: Woody joins the revolutionaries and helps them defeat the tyrants -- and then the revolutionaries take over and BECOME the tyrants. Woody got that. Its a life lesson, I think. But those themes were in his "early funny movies." From Annie Hall on, Woody became a "thoughtful" filmmaker and for the most point absurdity was out. "Airplane" and it ilk would handle that in the 80's.

Woody in the 80's became rather an "Upper East Side NYC" guy a chronicler of a specific place and time and people. (As diversity issues impact film production in this era, one wonders -- what do we do with the films of Woody Allen and his muse Ingmar Bergman? Could their subjects be any more white?)

Like old time filmmakers before him, Woody tossed out a movie a year with ease and the "major ones" sort of came out every few years -- Hannah and Her Sisters, Crime and Misdemeanors -- movies ABOUT something beyond Woody's usual intellectual doodles. Crimes and Misdemeanors has a great subject, I think - how SOME people can get away with ANYTHING, and OTHER people get away with nothing.

Woody's been working for decades now, his sex scandals HAVE hurt him, but he keeps making movies. Now with foreign funding. One just came out starring -- Wallace Shawn and Gina Gershon? Its come to that. Good actors, but not major.

Still, his heyday is long behind him: the 60s, the 70's(especially), the 80's.

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I think this is why people think his films are all "the same", even though Crimes & Misdemeanors doesn't feel like Annie Hall at all.

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Agreed. Different things on his mind, over a decade apart. Annie Hall is like a bridge between "the early funny ones" and the more intellectual later ones -- and established NYC as his near permanent turf -- until his scandals drove him to Europe.

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I attribut that '70s goodness to the European thing, too. Directors like Scorsese grew up on foreign cinema and brought that true Art thing to Hollywood.

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A lot of directors in the 70's "copycatted" the movies they love. Bogdanovich gave us Whats Up Doc as a remake of Bringing Up Baby. DePalma loved remaking Hitchcock movies with more blood and sex. Lucas went for Buck Rogers and movie serials.

But an entire contingent loved Eurofilm and brought it to the American 70's film: Coppola, Ashby, Rafelson Mazursky, Altman, Scorsese.

And of course Roman Polanski WAS Eurofilm.

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I love Star Wars, but I kinda blame it for the end of that era. Star Wars gave the studios a clear direction: toys. That's when you can hear the little, cash-register CA-CHING gears turning in their little, executive heads.

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I was there, and you could FEEL it. Two things at once: a RETURN to entertainment, and something new and BETTER in terms of the quality, the effects, the writing (hell, even the stars -- Sir Alec Guiness was a BIG DEAL to be in Star Wars.)

And the toys.

From my readings it seems that the movies had generally been an "OK" source of income -- movies made a little money, stars and directors were well paid, but blockbusters were few and flops were many.

Then, once the 70's saw The Godfather, The Exorcist, Jaws and Star Wars make BIG money -- the corporate raiders came in and pushed most of the artists OUT. and many of the movie moguls of the 80s had been TV moguls in the 70s.


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Every era of movies has its greatness (and its dreck), so I don't want to start going, "Oh, the '70s were the last of the great movie eras!" but there was something special there, and it definitely died (as opposed to just phasing into different sensibilities).

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Well, the period 1967-1977 is almost a cliché now as "a Golden Age" (it starts with Bonnie and Clyde and The Graduate in 1967 and ends with Star Wars in 1977) but its a little overrated.

Failing studios put out a LOT of cheapjack looking dreck: The Omega Man, Skyjacked; Soylent Green and Airport 75(sorry, Charlton)...most Charles Bronson movies.

Meanwhile, the well reviewed major artists started making movies nobody but critics saw: Altman and Rafelson and Dennis Hopper are in this category.

Even Chinatown wasn't a HUGE hit in 1974. Too much of a downer. Too R-rated for big crowds.

I think the 70's glow mainly because a lot of directors were allowed to make "great art, bad box office" films.

By the way, I think 1957 to 1967 is a great era, too. You get Hitchcock at his best, Wilder at his best, Preminger at his best, Lean at his best; you get Stanley Kubrick AND Blake Edwards, you get "meaty" movies for big stars like Paul Newman and Steve McQueen to appear in, etc.

Every era's pretty good. Maybe even this one....

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Chinatown, yes. I think I could watch that movie on a loop and it'd take me three days to get bored.

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A great one. I think this is interesting: it was a SUMMER movie, and it pretty much dominated the summer of 1974 as Jaws would dominate the next summer of 1975. Except with this difference: Chinatown was NOT a big blockbuster, it was just covered all the time in the papers and magazines. It was NOT what "a summer movie" was going to be.

And yet, it kinda was. It was "genre." It was a mystery movie. It had a historic bloody act of violence(Nicholson's nose gets sliced and he wears a bandage or stiches for the rest of the movie.) It has a couple of murders, a couple of shoots, a good fight.

And it has a great big 1974 R-rated secret to change movie history a bit. Incest. And NOT rape.

And it has an overlay of politics to keep it "smart" and and overlay of tragedy to keep it Shakespearean.

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Jerks-as-heroes.. Movies have always had jerks, but the interesting thing is when they're the hero. I love a good, classic hero archetype, too, but there's something so, so fun about jerks. Larry David on Curb Your Enthusiasm? Don Draper? Jerks give great story possibilities.

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There's this really elastic phrase called "anti-hero." I've never felt it has been really defined well enough. Is an anti-hero a "good guy" who fights the system? Or is an anti-hero a "bad guy" whom we can't help but root for?

I think in TV terms, the anti-hero dates back to smilin' Larry Hagman as "JR" on Dallas. His brother Bobby was a real nice guy, right?(I barely watched the show) but JR was "the bad guy" who got away with everything. And folks loved him. Or loved to hate him. Or something.

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The modern cable anti-hero starts with Tony Soprano I'd say. We already kinda liked Michael and Sonny Corleone, but this guy was even better: a family man, a leader, very sexual (as MIchael Corleone was NOT), very funny. And he had a wife and two kids and a McMansion -- and he strangled people with his bare hands and a garrote.

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Tony Soprano "opened the flood gates' on "likeable bad guys": Breaking Bad and Man Men are quality. I'm afraid a few later models are more broad -- The Americans and Ozark(which feature evil WOMEN) and...well, everything.

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Larry David on Curb Your Enthusiasm?

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Curb Your Enthusiam did something really stunning, I felt: it revealed that Seinfeld wasn't really SEINFELD's baby...or life view, at all.

Seinfeld's stand-up on the show never really fit the nastiness (and laughs) of the episodes that followed...we came to realize that this was the "vision of Larry David." Larry didn't look all that great as a young comedian, but he aged into a pretty impressively middle-aged grouch, with the sex appeal of a very rich man(with a very pretty wife --with the face of a "sexy duck" said one critic) and...Larry gave voice to ALL of our daily frustrations and the realities of absurd day to day life.

A great show. At least in the beginning. I don't watch it anymore. 11 seasons was enough.

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Speaking of jerks as heroes:

I give you Jack Nicholson in As Good as It Gets. They gave him an Oscar for that one but it was like Larry David gone totally sour. The story "excused" Jack's madness as mental illness. But he was made very rich which(a great moral) allowed him to get away with everything.

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There is a wisdom to knowing when to fold 'em (that's Kenny, not Lenny).

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A return to The Heartbreak Kid (though Lenny is surely a "jerk predecessor" to Larry David).

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But it's bad to dissolve the marriage after 5 days; I'm not letting Lenny off the hook. It's not because it's bad to cut his losses - that's good. The mistake is barreling in with so little regard for one's partner or oneself that the marriage is doomed before it starts.

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Yes. I think someone said that in a perfect world, getting married would be as hard as getting a divorce.. to put some real weight on it. (Of course, these days divorce can be pretty quick, too.)

Still, I know of lots of marriages -- mainly of my parents generation -- where whirlwind courtships led to marriages in a matter of days or weeks. (Men going off to war often impacted this.) And many of THOSE marriages lasted. Let's be romantic: if it is time, and you are of age and you meet "the one" -- why not commit all the way? Nice when it happens.

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The callous attitude Lenny (or Hollywood celebs) have towards romance and marriage is what I find deplorable, mockable - not knowing when it's time to get out.

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OK..I understand that. Put another way: if you are ready to quit that quickly in to it, you never put much thought to it in the first place.

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Commitment is good. That's the other reason we cock our eyebrows at people pulling the parachute that quickly into a marriage: they clearly aren't trying at all. See a counsellor. Put in a little effort.

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Well, there has always been a "societal" reason for marriage on top of the romantic reasons: to create stability, promote reproduction, establish family units, reduce a trend towards "lustful non-commitment." Some of that is out of style, but some of it is a good thing.

When you are in a marriage, it sure hurts to find out that your 'soul mate" could just as well be with another person ..and sometimes they make the change. Hurts. The "societal bond" thing is overcome. As Woody Allen said about HIS moves: "The heart wants what it wants."

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funny (in spite of himself) is how much effort he's willing to put in to the dumb decision. If he worked half as hard at his marriage (and finding a good partner to begin with) as he did at leaving her, he'd have been happy.

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Yep. But I guess he found Cybill to be more worth everything than Jeannie. (Me, I don't; beautiful Cybill is, but to her determent, she never came off as a woman that a man could really TRUST.)

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I feel like we've dissected M*A*S*H*, Animal House, and other "frat bro" movies before… I seem to recall a very, very in-depth conversation on the subject.

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I'm sure we have. I tend to have certain favorite films and I like to link them and discuss them, and I'm sure we have...

...but its no biggie to revisitt the issues or to introduce other readers to them.

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Bump.

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