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Which Platter-Party Attendee Would The Monster Have First Eaten First?

posted 19 years ago by Attillio
6 replies | jump to latest

IF that giant gila monster HAD broken through the barn wall completely, which "hapless" soul do you think the gila monster would have swallowed first, Chase, Lisa, Sheriff Jeff, Old Man Harris, one of the many other teenagers there, or, possibly, that bald-headed and exceedingly grumpy millionaire?

Personally, I think that the gila monster would have "munched-on" the almost zaftig disc jockey, "Steam-Roller" Smith, who, looked as if he tipped the scales at around 220 lbs. or so. (Mangia, gila monster, and bon appetit!)

[–] unclerobb 18 years ago

I agree. It would have to be Steam Roller Smith, who got so drunk that he couldn't identify a gila monster as "big as a bus" with "pink and black stripes" that ran him off the road. Not that gila monsters have a sense of justice, but Smith is the only character in the movie that could have saved the rest of the victims. Mangia, gila monster, and bon appetit!

[–] bobquack 15 years ago

Hopefully that riled-up father who was calling for Chase's arrest.

"Klaatu barada nikto"

[–] richard-865 15 years ago

If the gila monster had consumed Old Man Harris, they would have had a drunken gila monster on their hands. Gila monsters travel in straight lines? Not in this case!

[–] mrsramthun 15 years ago

I would have sort of "accidentally" shoved Mr. Wheeler in front of it and ran the other way LOL.

[–] DrScore 14 years ago

Hate to say it , but Chase is my top candidate. Anything that would have ended that awful "Children Laugh" song.

[–] Attillio 12 years ago

All of your sugestions are terrific! LMAO!!!