Bring Back Johnny!

Donald Trump is still sore at late night host Jimmy Kimmel for making him the laughingstock of the 2024 Academy Awards ("Isn't it past your jail time?") back in March. So much so that he thinks Johnny Carson should take over the show and make late night great again.

Trump told his worshipers at a Pennsylvania rally that the jokes Kimmel and Colbert tell aren't funny. "It's supposed to be comedy," he rued. "It's hatred."

"Where's Johnny Carson?" a dazed Trump queried the crowd. "Bring back Johnny."

No one in the bleachers had the heart to tell their leader — who is starting to look and behave like the embunkered Hitler in Downfall — that Carson retired from the show in 1992 and died in 2005. Or it just could be that his followers believe Trump has the power to raise Carson from the dead and put him back at his desk to interview fresh young talent like Angie Dickinson and Joey Bishop.

The problem is, when he was alive, Carson thought Trump was a loser just like Kimmel and Colbert do.