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So this girl invited me to her hotel room last night


I’ve known her for years, we sort of “talked” and hung out for a bit at one point and then we fell out of touch for 5-6 years, during which time she got married, left town and started a new career.

She’s my age, 36 and although we shared a mutual attraction I never did seal the deal. She’s beautiful, I always regretted dropping the ball. I noticed on Instagram she reverted to her maiden name so I shot her a message, what the hell. Maybe this is part of god’s plan, unfinished business yada yada.

We chat a bit and she tells me she’s going through a tough time. As I suspected, marriage is failing/failed and she’s currently staying at a hotel. Invites me to come by and have a drink, and of course I immediately got excited and assumed this could be potentially a good opportunity for two consenting adults to have some fun.

As always, I didn’t get my hopes up because I’ve gone to several “hook ups” that didn’t materialize and been disappointed. I still put myself together nicely and took condoms and a bottle of wine.

She seemed pretty excited about me coming, said she was hopping in the shower. Several texts and phone calls later I arrived at around 8:00 pm. I go in, big hugs and smiles. I opened the bottle and poured a couple glasses as she finished blow drying her hair. We spent a good 20-30 minutes catching up, briefly touched on her marriage/breakup and what she was going through. She had bruises on her arm which I asked if they were from him and she said yes. She told me he had been abusive but I didn’t realize the extent or whether it had been verbal or physical.

As a friend I made sure to try and console her and let her get everything off of her chest, however I tried not to dwell on that too much as I wanted to take her mind off of that as I could see how devastated she was and wanted to cheer her up and alieviate some stress, I also didn’t want to be just a shoulder to cry on.

Once we had moved past that stuff we sat on her bed talking for an hour or two. I tried to feel it out and escalate if I could but we weren’t that close together and it’s obviously not easy to discretely get closer but there were a few instances where she layed down next to me to show me pictures on her phone, our faces were pretty close together but I didn’t feel comfortable enough making a move.

I had to work super early so I started to wrap things up around 11 and she tried to get me to stay while she went and got another bottle of wine, I didn’t want to be miserable for an 8 hour shift on the off chance I might get laid. I left on a good note and she wants to hang again, I guess I’m just wondering how to escalate next time/make a move? Should I be honest and up front with my intentions/feelings towards her or just play it cool until her divorce blows over? Or C. Should I just run in the opposite direction as it sounds like a sketchy situation?

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Run.

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This sounds like a big mess.

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sounds like she needs a friend right now.

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It sounds like she likes you but she may be afraid to get intimate with you because of her abusive husband. No telling what he would do to her if he found out.....

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Depends on what you want and expect. A one night stand and forever awkwardness? Or do you want to see if something real will develope between you two?

If the former, and you don't give a shit about how she'll feel, then go for it.

Sounds like you have a conscience, though. Take it slow. She needs a friend, maybe she wanted something more. Don't expect her to know right now.

I was in a similar position once, a little younger than you, about 30. Except I was the one in the middle of getting divorced and she was someone I had known in HS. She was a couple years younger and I remembered a really skinny kid with a pretty cute face. I didn't know she had a mad crush on me. We ran into each other 14 years later.

We did an awkward dance for a while, being friends, while we each briefly got involved with other people. Eventually, the time was right.

That was 30 years ago, she turned out to be the love of my life and mother to my only child.

I'm glad I didn't blow it on a one night stand, even though I did learn the sex would be fantastic.

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Some sagely advice there, thanks.

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Looking forward to your post about how some bitch gave you crabs.

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Funniest post I’ve read all day 🤣🤣🤣

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I owed you one.
And Happy Anniversary btw.

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Thank you my dear.

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Forget it, that's how you proceed.
You sound like you are just wanting to get laid and faking being a nice guy.
She is in a tough spot in her life and doesn't need someone to use her.
In fact, your one chance is just ignore her if she tries to have sex with you,
because she is probably just using sex to get attention, and if you fall for
that she will ultimately not like you.
Someone has to be the strong adult ... if it is you, you will gain her lifelong
admiration ... if not you are just trying to get laid at the expense of a
vulnerable women you will ultimately feel bad about yourself for that.

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There is, by chance, a short version of this story?

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