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Why did my life turn out like this for me?

posted 6 years ago by [deleted]
8 replies | jump to latest

I had so much promise. I was personable, I was bright. Oh, maybe not academically speaking, but ... I was perceptive. I always know when someone's uncomfortable on a message board. It became very clear to me sitting out there today, that every decision I've ever made, in my entire life, has been wrong. My life is the opposite of everything I want it to be. Every instinct I have, in every of life, be it something to wear, something to eat ... It's all been wrong.

[–] KnowsMore (523) 6 years ago

Bald men, with no jobs, and no money, who live with their parents, don't approach strange women.

[–] [deleted] 6 years ago

Yes, I will do the opposite. I used to post here and do nothing, and regret it for the rest of the day, so now I will do the opposite, and I will do something!

[–] KnowsMore (523) 6 years ago

Well, here's your chance to try the opposite. Instead of posting here and being intimidated by women, Tinder it and going right up to them.

[–] [deleted] 6 years ago

People think I'm gay..

[–] KnowsMore (523) 6 years ago

And do your parents know?

[–] [deleted] 6 years ago

Know what?

[–] KnowsMore (523) 6 years ago

It's at this point, I swear I heard a big clunk noise in pop-actor's head as his eyes light up like sunbeams. Pop Poirot has solved the mystery (Actually, since he took so long to figure it out he's probably closer to Pot-on-the-go than Hercule Poirot, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. Heck, it usually took the guys on "Three's Company" 35 years to figure out there were two unaired pilots...)

[–] [deleted] 6 years ago

Well, you could move in with my parents.